A little background information to start you off....I had posted my story in the thread titled "Ectopic pregnancy and the X-files". Supposedly, my husband had gotten the OW pregnant, she told him that it was an ectopic pregnancy, and that her tubes had been tied, yet when she had a biopsy performed last December, her doctor "accidentally" untied one, thus she became pregnant. Supposedly, she flew out of state and had this pregnancy terminated, yet came back a month later stating that it had been moved to her uterus.

My husband ended the affair and returned back to me. We have doing pretty well at recovery, except the OW and her family keep intruding by sending us emails about "the baby". We never respond, but save these emails to be used as evidence. My husband and I have an appointment this afternoon with a lawyer.

Supposedly, "this baby" is due in October, and the OW has been seeing a specialist who deals with risky pregnancies. I guess the OW gets a shot twice a week to prevent a miscarriage. She stated that it will be a miracle if "the baby" survives past the 5th month (June).


Here is part of the latest email that was sent from the OW's sister in law. These "updates" on "the baby" started on April 1st, and we used to get 4 or 5 a day until I told them to leave us alone. They've trickled down to 1 or 2 a week now.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Chris and I were talking on the way home from the doctor and as soon as it is safe enough, she is going to have a paternity test done. From what I can tell from the research that I have done, as soon as the test comes back, you will be responsable for half of all her prenatal care,half of having the baby moved and half of what the delivery cost. Your half starts from the time your baby was conceived. The only way that you would not be responsable is if Chris signs a waiver. She just wants what is best for your baby. She has been following all of the doctors orders.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Of course, we'll be taking all the pertinent emails and voice mails with us to the lawyer, but does anyone know if this woman actually knows what she's talking about????

They're trying to trick my husband into taking a paternity test, but he will not do it until he's court ordered. Supposedly, the OW told him that she wasn't sleeping with anyone else during the time they had their affair, yet she was living with her husband at the time. She claims that she didn't have sex with her husband, yet why is she requesting a paternity test? Something doesn't sound right. I pray that when and if the time comes, and "the baby" is born, then it's not my husband's.

Thanks for listening...again........*sigh*

The best thing you can do is get a lawyer. Make her sign a waiver that she didn't sleep w/ her H! ANd that way when the test comes back neg, sue her and harrass her for awhile!. Depending on the state your in. Yes he is responsible for the bills that have to do w. the baby. Ask your attorney to make sure and good luck.

your DH's exow is a lying loon. Her and her family are harassing you two, who knows, it could be her emailing from somewhere claiming it's family.

First off, tell her to sue the Doctor who "accidently" untied her tubes, he is responsible for her pregnancy, see where that gets her.

You need to have an attorney send her and her family a cease and desist letter immediately, what they are doing is pure harrassment, not to mention attempted extortion! Let them know you will file charges if they contact you two any way shape or form and to only contact you two if and when a baby ever arrives, that your DH will be happy to submit to a peternity test once the courts have ordered it.

This is ridiculous, a grown woman acting like this, and her family, how on earth could they have let her get them in the middle and act so immature and spiteful. Lets hope ol sis in law's DH never strays.

<small>[ April 16, 2004, 04:23 PM: Message edited by: mshermi ]</small>

lawyer, lawyer, lawyer, lawyer......YOU know what to do.

She's crazy! just a STOW ("stereo-typical-other-woman)

I think you are doing everything you should be doing right now. Ignore the emails, save them for evidence, copies for lawyers, and no $$$$$$$ or DNA until court ordered.

Don't forget about filing the legal separation and CS for your kids so that if in some strange universe a baby is produced, YOU and your children are protected.

And do what sunny said too. A friend of a poster here did that. They were able to sue the STOW for extortion and get their lawyer fees paid by the lying, stupid STOW!!!!!!!

H may be liable for 1/2 of medical bills but so what!!! They will just tack it on as arrears and add it to the monthly payment but.......we will all be waiting to see what transpires in the next few months. And we will be laughing w/ you all the way to the bank.

Hey and think of it this way...this gives you and H a 'common enemy' to fight against together instead of yourselves. After the dust settles don't forget to take care of yourselves and face your own issues, together.

You will get through this, you will and your marriage will be better than ever and you will have something to actually laugh about----STOW!!!!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

You know....this is what keeps popping up in my mind...

Being that the OW lied to my husband from the beginning, I'm wondering if she actually lied about her tubes being tied in the first place? What if she was able to get pregnant all along and she is actually pregnant now...with the intention of trying to trap my husband or persuade him to leave me? When he decided to return back to me last month, she pretended that the baby was aborted, sat back and waited a month, and then decided to mess with our heads again. Why would she be willing to go through this deception, if it wasn't true, to some extent? If she's thought of as a lying fool now, then why subject herself to be proven to be a lying fool in June when she doesn't start showing? Of course, I'll have no way of seeing for myself if she's getting fatter, because if I try to watch her house, then I'll be accused of stalking. The curiosity is simply killing me, and perhaps that's what she's hoping for. She seems to be pretty good at twisting the law to suit her needs, yet I can't do anything to defend myself. He's unfaithful to me, and I end up paying the price for it. Sorry to sound so bitter, but I'm sure most of you know how I'm feeling.

We did speak to an attorney yesterday, and there's not much we can do. Since the emails have slowed down, we have no basis to get a restraining order. I will be looking into the "cease and desist" order though....

It's pretty sad when an attorney looks over the evidence that you've brought in and laughs at you. So comforting..... It was just an ititial consulation, we wouldn't hire this attorney anyway. We didn't like his attitude.

Why did my husband have to choose a Glenn Close wannabe (Fatal Attraction) to have an affair with? I told him that the next time that he thinks about having an affair with someone, get a mental health certificiate first, it will save him and me alot of grief later.

Thanks for letting me vent again.

Arab: Like you said she is either lying about the tubes being tied, or She's lying about the accidently got it untied. If she is pregnant the only shot I can think of that she is getting right now would be progrestone......which more than likely she's lying about too as I was on those shots and I did them at home 2 times a day. Not two times a week. That will do nothing. You stay on those shots until your 12 weeks pregnant. Yes you can find out paternity before the child is born, but most states don't force it until the child is born. Yes if DNA comes back postive, your h is responsible for 1/2 of all of her medical expenes as well as the baby's. It it were me, I'd show good faith and have that dna test done while she's in hospital having that baby if it comes to that. Why wait for a court order....Get your attorney in place now and have all your ducks in a row.

Run as fast as you can to the best attorney you can find. I had a wonderful day at a spa, courtesy of a friend, who happend to be a BW. She and her husband were ran through the ringer by a ow. Their attorney was brilliant. OW signed an affadavit that he was the only person possible to be the father, etc. She the harrassed and harrassed. They looked into and purchased insurance, had legal bills, etc. Guess what? The DNA proved not to be the husbands!! They immeidately filed suit and dropped said insurance policy on the child. The couple pushed this and started law suit proceedings. The ow and her family were all distraught. Suddenly the expected this young couple to "do the right thing" and drop all the charges. Funny how the BW are always asked to to "do the right thing" but only if it benefits the ow!!!! Long story short, they ended up settling out of court and the couple had their legal fees (all of them) paid, along with a few thousand dollars for the harrassment. The ow is now without her home and her car and has to live with her parents. The BW blew the money on a day spa for herself and her supporters. It was a great day.

So do not assume anything. Get the laywer and start slapping these people back. They have no right to harrass you. Even if the child is his, they have no right to be calling you. Get moving. And do as KT has said. Get all your personal finances in place just in case, to protect assets for the children of the marriage, as it was intended.

She may or may not be pregnant, but either way it is none of your concern. Tell her you could care less and to leave you alone.

My word what a story...I seldom post anymore but something sounded so familiar here...the baby might not make it past the 5th month...just 2 years ago we were hearing the very same thing from FOW..
Most women begin to show at this point and a "fake" pregnancy is a lot harder to pull off.

And as far as moving an embryo from the fallopian tubes to a womans uterus I'd think if this was even in the clinical stages it would be all over the media.

I hope you recieve "the get out of jail free card" as we did, because dealing with infidelity is hard enough as it is.

One more thing. 50% is 50%. Your husband, if the father would be responsible for 50% and that is it. If it is his child and the total bills came to $20,000 he would owe $10,000 and that is that. OW assume that he is responsible for all of it. WRONG. A good attorney will lead you through this. Do not give this woman one red cent. Not one.

I agree that she will probably "lose" the child. Either way you are being harrassed. Slap these lunatics back into their hole. Tell them to leave you alone and mean it. If and when the child is born (and I hope she isn't pregnant, or it isn't your husbands), you can figure things out then. In the meantime, protect your family legally and financially. Ignore her and spend time healing and gdtting strong.

I think you have a faker here. I hope so!!!

If the laywer laughed, move on. Keep looking into good attorneys until you find one that respects you.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Arabesque:
<strong> you will be responsable for half of all her prenatal care,half of having the baby moved and half of what the delivery cost. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Total lies. A tubal pregnancy cannot be "moved." No ifs, ands, or buts.

Well, I have posted my story in a couple of other threads here, but I'll just kind of update what we're waiting for...

My husband had hired a private investigator and will be receiving his report sometime next week. This woman has been married AND divorced 3 times already. I found some public court records that seem to indicate that she filed for divorce (and won) with the man she's living with now, who she claims is her husband. I had asked a question on a paternity website about who would be financially responsible for "this baby", until DNA is proven, and was told that her husband may be. But, if they're not married, then she can point her finger at my husband. We'll just have to wait and see.

We haven't gone after her with a restraining order yet (harassment) because I'm waiting to go to court for some false charges that she filed against me. When the PI's report comes back, and my case is dismissed (hopefully), then we will pursue the RO and hire the lawyer.

3 weeks and then it's MY TURN to pull the strings. I'm not a person who likes to get revenge, but as they say "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned". We will go after her using lawful means, and I will not stop until she's out of our lives for good. So far, I've been unable to defend myself, have had my reputation ruined at my former job, etc.

Please...I'm not trying to imply that I want to destroy her life, but I do want her to get the message that if you play with fire, expect to get burnt. If only she had just accepted the fact that their affair was over and walked away....

I'm simply waiting for when the time is right. In the meantime, I hope that the PI will shed some light on whether or not she is actually pregnant. That's all I want to know.