Sorry to have missed you the other day. wWould luv to chat again on IM someday as we did once many moons ago--feels like many moons ago.

I think H is for sure going to do DNA test--which IMO he should.

Maybe i will catch you tonight--I will get on computer right after I get home and see who is around.

Oh good, I'm glad he's getting proactive. DNA is a must.

Sorry I missed you too. I wasn't the one that IM'd your H thinking it was you, was I?

Love ya!

No just BBYG--no biggie. Are you on IM--it is easier to chat there.

Well H isn't making dinner tonight--I asked him not to. He informed me of that--should I have let him--what do you think--it is hard for me not to take that as a sign that he whats to stay together--so that is why I said not to--shoot I don't know and he warned me not to read too much into that kind of stuff. Just trying to protect my heart.

You know would love to have let him but heart says to and head say keep some space protect yourself.

I think you analyze stuff too much. I recognize another analyze-it-to-death club member when I see her, you know! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

If he offered to make dinner, and you thought that sounded good, and you were hungry, and didn't feel like cooking, and it wasn't beer butt chicken leftovers or whatever, then yep, why not just say yes? If you didn't feel like it, then just say no. Either way, just go with the flow. I think he's been responding best to the easy going al, not the one that measures everything to death, don't you think?

al, he's NOT done, or he'd of been gone long ago! I DO WISH he'd be DONE eating cake and sitting on the fence. He's gotta be one fat, sore butted dude by now!!!

What can I say???...It's Fri. and two west coast girls kept me up waaaaaaaaaaaay past my bedtime last night!!!!

okay who besides me? DO I need to spank KT?

You are right I shouldn't have said no but I did and well I have to stick to it.

YEah--I know I over-analyze--he tells me so--hates this high strung AL and loves the one that is mellow and goes with the flow--better triple my paxil <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I LBed a little today and well I think I have to make up for some ground I recently lost--you undertand H better than you realize--I pushed him away today maybe--hard for not to over-analyze--stressful week for me--week before flow <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
I just feel needy--so question for you--he will be at the house when I get home tonight before he goes to work--what should I do? Just act calm, cool, collected, and upbeat and bring up in prior not so good conversation from earlier.

About the dinner, I think you missed my point. I wasn't saying you SHOULD'VE said yes, my point was, you should've said whatever YOU felt like saying.

About your question, I think you should be cool and calm, like I always suggest. If you want to apologize for previous LBs, that's good, but I wouldn't belabor the point, you know? Simply apologize from your heart without going over it play by play. If he seems all good and fine, and not pouty, you may not want to apologize at all, it might only serve to open a can of worms. Am I making any sense?

Didn't miss your point--just annoyed at myself because I said no once I was mad and hurt and wanted to punish him--I shouldn't have said it for those reason because truthfully I wanted him to make dinner--I thought it was nice.

Totally get the point of not apologizing and probably won't because i sent an e-mail and apologized.

OH yah--AD didn't see any cyber troll twisting your arm to stay on-line. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Ok, I see what you mean now. My bad for being the slow one!

Funny how often our words serve to only shoot ourselves in the foot, hey? You could've fixed it on the spot, (and it's still not too late), by apologizing and saying you were wrong, and that you'd actually love nothing better than for him to make dinner for you. I understand about protecting your heart al, really I do, but you need to keep the goal line in sight and mind.

Nah I made the call--don't want to sound desperate--I will let a dead dog lie with this one--i let my hurt and anger get in the way on this one--I have a feeling he is somewhat testing me--to see how I'm with him slowly coming around--I think some times I do more harm than good--he seems to be testign the waters.

last afternoon he said don't read too much into him making dinner for now but he didn't spout being done either--I know already told you that but you are right he doesn't want to go or he would have by now--but me he gives a little and I try and take a mile.

You DIDN'T see that arm twisting troll <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" /> ??? Must've just been on my screen then. Scarey looking thing <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> !!! You should see the red marks on my arms today too, (err...ummm, I mean my red baggy eyes) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> !!!

you goof ball
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />
--anyway--I think it would be worse to ask now--he is taking a nap anyway I think before he goes work now.

anything exciting happening this weekend? I have a wedding tomorrow evening at the country club--H works tonight and tomorrow night--My son is going to go to my parents tomorrow evening.

Bought my self a new really cute little black dress for the wedding. I hope H stops by before work tomorrow night so he can see me all looking fine. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Ok, we'll call the dinner saga, water under the bridge. Keep in mind though, that apologizing doesn't have to sound desperate. It can just be a statement, from the heart, but not necessarily "begging" for another chance or whatever. I agree, I think he is testing you a bit. Remember what I've said in the past, don't let YOUR reactions be determined solely by HIS behavior. You keep your eye on what you want the final outcome to be, and base your reactions on that.

I know everyone once in awhile (okay maybe more than that <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> ) I let that end goal escape and only see my immediate wants--look were that got H! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

If it feels right I will apologize one more time but if not water under the bridge. I won't be home until 5:00 and he will leave at about 5:30-5:45 I think.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I hope H stops by before work tomorrow night so he can see me all looking fine.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Me too, me too!! Knock him dead al!!! And by golly, have fun at the wedding! Country Club set, eh? Have a ball, you deserve it!!!

Oh trust me I will! Kinda hate going without him--but that's okay

BTW say the girl "friend" at my work today.

Wait a minute, wait a minute...hold the phone. That's right, you said something about already having apologized in an email. While I'd prefer you apologize in person, I don't think you need to do it 2 X's...that may seem a little needy. It was a dinner invite that got all goofed up by emotions, pride and whatever else. Perhaps it should be left alone if you've aplogized for the LB already. Don't want you being a doormat, and I don't think he wants that either.

the date friend? did you spike her coffee?

I wondered why you thought I should again--in person better but I didn't want to involve any bad emotions and sometimes e-mail helps with that.

Gotta run and work our switchboard until 4:30--and the computer is down up there so no more MB until tonight--try to see who is up to what tonight on IM or chat

Feel free to leave a response--I'll read it later.

i gotta run too. i've got a little found-the-on/off-button-on-the-comp-but-oh-so-cute-troll crawling under foot and wanting dinner. too bad he can't be like you and NOT want dinner for a change, (he never gets angry enough to refuse dinner...wait till i introduce brussel sprouts though)...LOL!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

so long al, saying a prayer for you girl!

<small>[ August 13, 2004, 06:10 PM: Message edited by: autumnday ]</small>