I have spent many months reading here... I found a lot inspiring stories and some stories very fustrating. I just want to jump in rescue you all.
I feel for all of you...
For a long time I have been meaning to come back and tell you my story. I have been extremely busy working in Medical Clinic.. and taking care of four children <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> , and my darling husband.
My H had an Affair '97 and it resulted in an OC. It came as complete shock for me. I never dreamed in million years that he would ever cheat on me. I have always prided that fact that we were such team...so in love. He always hated people that had affairs. Two years prior, my H's brother had an affair...my H refuse to have anything to do with him for over a year. So you can see why his affair came to a complete shock to me.
I'll never forget that day that my H sent the children out to the corner store. He grabbed my hand and asked me not to let go. He had something to tell me..just look on his face frightened me. I thought somebody had died or something. Then he began to tell me about his affair and god..she was pregnant. I swear everything started to turn black. I was physically sick for days. I couldn't eat or sleep. Needless to say; I flippped OUT.
My H followed me all over place...he was talking..and I never heard one single word he said. I was IN a FOG. I even prayed that god would take my life. I didn't want to live. I didn't want to see anybody and I didn't want to work. I simply couldn't function. Man was I sick. Looking back, I know I could never survive it again. I was never so broken in my life.
Thank goodness I had good friends and family to support me. My best friend took me to the best lawyer in town and my H moved in with my inlaws. I couldn't even bare to look at him at this point.
(I am trying to make this short; I am obvoiusly doing a poor job at that. (sorry)
As the weeks went by and I was determined to get a divorce; something struck me.... I could see the frightened look on my childrens face. I was torn. They wanted their daddy back and I relaized that I loved my H but at the same time I hated him. I knew we needed counselling.
My husband and I spent many months in therapy. The only way I knew that this would work is that I needed to be shown that we are #1 in his life.
The OW made our lives a nightmare; she actually had the nerve to show up at my childrens school and inform my children that they were going to have brother and sister. She never gave me nor my H a chance to talk to our children. She was real nut case. It cost us thousands. We were finally force to fight fire with fire and we went to court and got full custody of the OC. My H cut off all communication with her and would only deal with her through a lawyer.
It wasn't as simple as that, we had alot to struggle through. I still get flash backs but I know that I have my life back. I have grown to love my H's son as much as I love my other children. That was very difficult descision but if I told you the whole story (too long) we did not have choice we had to take custody.
Today, this little angel..is the sweetest thing on the face of the earth. I soon realize he was just as much a victim as I was.
Well, thank you for listening to my story.
wiz
