I guess I should be moving my posts to the Divorce/Divorcing board but I feel like I know you all so well.

Well, H was pleasant for a few days but that is over. Without going into a ton of detail I will try to summarize.

He wanted to talk so we did. Things were fine until I stood up for myself and said what I wanted to do. I know he did not have to agree with me but he did not have to turn it ugly. He began screaming at me again, calling me names like a F'en C***, a W**** ect. He was slamming things around, throwing my cloths on the floor, etc.

Last night it continued and this morning he said "Is that my box you have your stuff in?" I said yes. He said "Get you stuff out of my box." It's a stupid cardboard box. I said fine and I did it. What a child.

There has been so much more that I don't feel like posting it all. He is out of control and acting like a child.

He told me that I can't have the kids Monday night like I want and if I come over to get them that I AM putting them in the middle. Grrr.

I just want to get out of there and get on with me life. He is making this so difficult.

Luv,

I hope you can get full custody. He is calling you names that discribe his own behavior. And him arguing over a cardboard box is so childish. After all your love together, I know it hurts. But you know what they say. There is a thin line between love and hate. I would record him next time. Buy a small recorder and hide it on your person.

<small>[ September 02, 2004, 08:37 AM: Message edited by: Genia ]</small>

Luv,

So sorry u have to deal with this, what a baby, I though my H was bad, well he is. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

How soon before you can move? Maybe u should tape him like Genia suggested.

Praying for you. {{{{{{{{Luv))))))))

Genia and BG,
I thought about taping him last night. I may do it. I move on Sunday, he is supposed to take the kids to his parents house on Saturday. So I should have some peace beginning Saturday.

He actually left the house for several hours last night, ended up calling me about 5 times, of which I only answered once and hung up because he was being abusive. Anyway, he gets home, walks into my bedroom and wakes me up saying that I was rude for not picking up the phone or calling back. I told him that I was tired and did not want to talk. He said he did not care he would stand there and talk even if I did not want to hear him. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" /> I told him that I don't want to talk to him because he is mean and hurtful.

He took the garage door opener out of my car. Said he was going to change the lock, etc. He is out of control, yet he says it's me! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

I just don't get him.

My therapist said as long as I engage him in conversation I am hurting the kids. Now, this I can't figure out since the kids are sleeping. Also, if I keep my mouth shut and say nothing I am a b**** for that too and he just gets mad and starts storming around the house.

Did I tell you about my car yesterday. Seems my steering fluid was leaking like a faucet. When I stopped at the mechanics he said that he never saw anything like that. It was leaking from where the bolt connects to a hose and he has never seen a bolt get that loose on it's own. Said he has to tighten it about 5-6 turns. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> I hope to think he is NOT that stupid but he has been way off his rocker.

I can't wait to get out of there. Today is the first day my chest has been so heavy. I took a Xanix and now I feel sleepy. Not good.

Glad you are getting out--does H mention not wanting you to go or just acting like a lunatic?

You are moving on Sat.? This is best for you for now--do you guys own a house? I thought you did and if so then you will be selling it?

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Albany,

How's it going with you?

I have movers coming on Sunday but I will be moving some things on my own Saturday.

H has not said a word about not wanting me to do this. He has been looking for a house to buy and seems to be planning on moving on. However, I can't help but think his reaction is very extreem for someone that could careless if I leave. Unless, it's just a control issue with him. He does not have the control over me and that is driving him crazy.

I just can't believe he can say that I am making it adversarial when he is the one that goes off because I express something that I want and he does not agree with it. It just boggels my mind.

I can't wait to be free from him. All this does is solidify my decision.

luv,

I am so sorry but I know exactly what you are going trough, but when you leave do not leave your kids there take them with you. If I had let my kids stay with H and left it would have been considered abandonment. My attny said it was better for me to have the kids initaially if I was going for custody of them. So please take your kids with you don't move without them.

I know the pain that you fell and have lives it these past few weeks. They can really get out of control, well guess what it gets worse. Once you leave him he will get even more angry and then the outbursts will explode! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

I am not telling you what I think I am telling you what I know and what I have livedthese past few weeks. What's wrong with them they are okay as long as we are doing what they want us to do, act the way they want us to act. They can not have their cake and eat it to. It just doesn't work that way at least not forever.

My prayers are with you and I think of you daily. Just know that you by doing right - right and goodness will follow you. The Lord is on your side. keep your head up! You did nothing wrong here, and God will help you.

Remember: GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME AND ALL THE TIME GOD IS GOOD!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Love ya,

JT

Luv,

I think your husband did do something to your car. I would report this to the police what the mechanic said. Maybe you could get a restaining order so that you can keep the kids. When you get restraining orders you get full custody. He would get the kids every other weekend.

Hey JT, I responded to you post and I gave the same advice to you...It's not going to get easier with him. Too funny, we both know what they are like.

Well, I will be moving without them. He is taking them to his parents home while I move, so they don't have to see it take place. I told him that I wanted them on Monday, when he got back and he refused. I told my atty. all of this and she said let him win the Monday thing, just pick them up on Tuesday. She said we have a ton of battles to fight and this one is small compared to the rest.

I asked if he got nasty and I felt like I should leave could I take the kids or could I leave without them. She said yes, take them but if they are already asleep then just leave. If you are in fear the Court will understand that the anger is directed at me and not the kids.

It's going to be bad, I just know it.

WEll I am here to tell you IT WILL BE BAD!!!
But living in that He!! is worse don't you think. It is time to regain your sanity. I think that you are headed in the right direction. I am sorry that you are here with me, but glad that you are fighting for you and your kids.

Pray - Pray!!

I am hear for you whenever you need me!!

JT <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Hi Luv,

Again I would report the incident about the car to the police. Maybe it could help you take the kids with you when you leave.

<small>[ September 02, 2004, 12:53 PM: Message edited by: Genia ]</small>

Genia,
I have no proof that anyone messed with my car. Plus my H is a police officer where we live so they are not going to do anything for me. My attorney knows about it.

Luv,

Ouch! I feel for you girl.

Luv,

How r u doing today girl? I missed all your posts yesterday, I am sorry. Hopefully you will find some peace being away from H, a little anyway.

Why do they have to act so childish & crazy?

Praying for you, your kids & H. He has serious issues just like mine unfortunately. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

Hey BG,

Doing better today. H is going to his parents with the kids tonight so I will have peace.

I will tell you, I was reading Sunny's post and I am so jealous. I know that I could have done it. I would have loved OC if only my H was likes Sunny's H. I guess I still love him, even if he is being a big fat ugly jerk. I just wanted our family to be together and to be happy.

Well, I move this weekend and I am leaving work early to get some banking stuff done.

Have a great weekend and I hope things go smooth for you this weekend.

Luv,

I am praying for you this weekend. I will be going out of town so I won't get to post but I hope everything goes well with the move. I may have misunderstood you, but are the children going to be living with you or are they going to remain with your H?

I hope you have them because it will help you in the long run I think. I am glad that you are getting out of it so you can think clearly. But this will be the hardest thing you ever have to do. I must tell you the withdrawal is very hard. I get the urge to call my H almost every hour. I know that I can't but I want to and it hurts not to be able to talk to him, touch him, or see him. It must be done though, for my sanity and probably for my safety.

You just don't know what to expect when they go off the deep end or just lose all control of their actions. My H has never done this before, but when faced with the reality of losing his wife and kids for real I think he just flipped out! <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

But hey, I am PROUD of YOU!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

You will be fine.

praying for you STILL!

JT