No, No. The "One Happy Family" was sarcasm.

We are two families, no communication, only related through one individual's DNA.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by SaphireBlueUs2:

What does his wife have to say about that? [/QB]</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I wouldn't know. We are all NC.

<small>[ November 21, 2004, 11:34 PM: Message edited by: litlone ]</small>

Ok CLO,

Play fair...no need for the sarcasm.

There really are BW's hurting here who would appreciate it if u kept the sarcasm, smirks, laughs, hahaheehee's to yourself, no matter how funny u think it is. I can guarantee u the newbies don't like it at all. I am beyond that because I have been dealing with this B-S for awhile. So nothing surprises me or phases me really. But I have to let u know that was not cool.

Yes, the info was quite educating, and unbelievable, but at least show your sincerity...why are u here?

Take care, no harm intended.

Go Figure,
The sarcasm of "One Big Happy FAmily" was not meant to hurt anyone here.
I'm laughing at my own situation. Since we all have the same name and share a child, one would assume we're a "family" to some extent.

Couldn't be farther from the truth.

Ok CLO,

Whatever u say. Its all good.

Better to laugh, than to cry, right?

Right!

And HEY, if you can't laugh at yourself, who CAN you laugh at?

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">
What does his wife have to say about that? [/QB]</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I wouldn't know. We are all NC. [/QB][/QUOTE]

OK so then, when you did the change, did you even think about how she would feel? Or it just didnt matter as long as you did for you?

To me this is mind boggling. I could never do something like that. I could never intentionally do something that may bring another additional pain. Especially one that is already hurt by things that I have done. No reasons will justify that.

Then again thats just me.

Absolutely CLO!

I will let u try to redeem yourself before the other BW's jump all over u. (lol).

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by CheerfulLittleOne:
<strong> Right!

And HEY, if you can't laugh at yourself, who CAN you laugh at?

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well you kind of laughed at the "family", you kind of laughed at the wife, you kind of laughed at the situation that you and MM created.

I know, I know that was not your intention...But you did.

Anyway CLO,

Since u are here, I wanted to ask some questions, since u sound like a proud OW, or perhaps I should say one that has moved on with her life. Once again, no harm intended...just some insite please if u don't mind. (Sorry to jack your thread LBelle).

So how do u look at your situation now ?( since u have NC ) I know u love your child, lets make that clear. Seriously, do u look back and say, I can't believe I got myself into this situation?? Would u do things differently? ( No reflection on your child whatsoever, just the other facts involved like your involvement w/MM, etc.)

GoFigure,
Thanks for gettin' my back, but I'm sure I've got it all coming to me. To think I could post here without an attack would be crazy. I've been reading here far too long to not expect a backlash.


Saphire,
My intent was not to hurt the BS, but to share the same name as my child. I would highly doubt xMM's W would care. If she does, she really shouldn't. I should be "Nothing" to them, not even thought of. (I believe that's LynnG's motto). If I'm not even thought of, then why would changing my last name matter to them?

Hi litlone,

You have shown me what could be coming. I hate the "can't talk to you" stuff from credit cards or insurance. Since you had tried to get the insurance the info and they didn't want to hear it from you, did you feel like just letting it lapse??? You would have done what you could! I guess that would hurt OC, but what are you going to do.

CLO,
Do you come to just throw a bomb into the discussion or do you mean to be helpful? I am still appalled that you changed your name to the family name. Contact or no, that was awful. If you don't like your last name....change both your and your child's to something else altogether!

CLO,

Why not change OC's last name to yours instead? Oh I forgot, u didn't like your last name.

I personally would not of done it, but to each his own. It is kind of like a slap in the face to the BW. Even though u have no contact, don't think she doesn't remember everything, just like u remember everything. She would probably have a heart attack. U r promoting domestic violence with this one....it is not funny, even thou I am laughing...I just can not believe it.(that kind of laugh)

If your intentions for changing your name were as u said, then so be it...we r not anyones judge or jury...that's Gods job...but if for any other reason, then perhaps there are some deep issues that u may want to address within yourself.

Its like a secret...and u say, they (BW & MM) will never know, and u will never tell...but u know, and so will your child when they get older. Just my 2 cents.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by CheerfulLittleOne:
<strong>


Saphire,
My intent was not to hurt the BS, but to share the same name as my child. I would highly doubt xMM's W would care. If she does, she really shouldn't. I should be "Nothing" to them, not even thought of. (I believe that's LynnG's motto). If I'm not even thought of, then why would changing my last name matter to them? </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Ahh so you don't see how that can bother/hurt her and the family? Dont get me wrong the OC to have dads last name is NOT the problem. Its just I have never heard of anyone doing what you did. As a BW I find it insulting if I may be so frank.

No worries do for you.

<small>[ November 21, 2004, 11:33 PM: Message edited by: litlone ]</small>

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Gofigure:
<strong> Anyway CLO,
So how do u look at your situation now ?( since u have NC ) I know u love your child, lets make that clear. Seriously, do u look back and say, I can't believe I got myself into this situation?? Would u do things differently? ( No reflection on your child whatsoever, just the other facts involved like your involvement w/MM, etc.) </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Sorry GoFigure, I just now read this.

How do I look at my situation now? Well, I'm happy being a single mom that does not have to share custody with MM. I'm happy that I get to spend all of my time with our child. I don't think I'd want to ship him off for weekends or summer/holiday breaks. Let's face it, if I didn't want a child, I wouldn't have a child. I love being a mom and I'm going to be the best mom I can be.

Do I believe I got myself into this situation? Not really. I can't believe I fell for MM's pity-party and lies. I honestly thought he was divorcing, aferall, his W had kicked him out. He gave me the big sob story about what an evil, mean, abusive W he had. I fell for it, hook, line and sinker.

Would I do things differently? In some ways. Looking back, I can see that I should have waited to see D papers. I don't regret our relationship, I don't regret our child, I don't regret that he is the father of my child. He is a good person. He's doing what's best for him right now. I can't blame him for looking out for number one. My opinion is that he should have a relationship with his child (and he told me he would, but has yet followed through). I can't force him to play an active role in our child's life. He's the one missing out, and like I said before, it's a lot easier for me having NC. I'm not saying it's right, I'm just saying it's easier.

<small>[ October 12, 2004, 08:57 PM: Message edited by: CheerfulLittleOne ]</small>

litlone,

It is perfectly legal.

If I wanted to change my name to Brittany Spears I could do it. The courts really don't care, as long as you're not a fugitive trying to get a "Get out of Jail Free" card, anyone can change their name to anything.

I don't know if MM & W know. I haven't talked to them in eons.

I haven't read all of these replies.

CLO, sorry but changing your name to XMM's is EEEEEEWW! Totally lacking in boundaries.

Our XOW gave OC her name, same as the maternal-sibs. That's sensible. But she's remarried and it's possible she changed their names to his. I plan to ask OC what name she goes by next time we have her.

Coming from an XMow,I find it appauling that Cheerful changed her name to that of her Xmm. Talk about delusional!!! When and if the Bw finds out she is going to be truly sick!!

As for it being legal, unfortuantly it is. My father in laws girlfriend did it. They had a daughter together, didn't want to get married so she just changed her last name. Difference in these two situations is that FIL is still with his girlfriend, 9yrs.

I didn't give my two children Xmm last name. They have mine. With H Xow she named his son after her father. So his son is a third in her line of the family.