Does anyone know if H has to pay cs if he can give up all paternal rights but still pay cs. Cuz thats what my H wants. Is that possible.

He will still have to pay cs. Basically by giving her sole/legal/physcial and primary custody is giving up all his parental rights. Unless she agrees to terminate his rights and has someone to adopt the child the judge won't let him just terminate. At least in my states and most others that I know of.

Some states won't even give sole custody unless the situation falls under the "detrimental to child" category like in cases of abuse, certain criminal activities or abandonment. Most states are starting to lean towards automatic joint custody agreements.

As far as termination of rights, in most states this only happens if someone else is petitioning to adopt the child. Otherwise, the state is not going to terminate rights because of the possibility of the state having to pay to raise the child if the custodial parent can't manage on their own. But I have heard of some cases in which it was allowed in which the custodial parent was financially well off to raise the child on their own (and it was well documented) or cases where the noncustodial parent set up a substantial trust fund in which money could be pulled monthly and all contact was through the noncustodial parent's lawyer or manager of the trust fund. I understand this could be a very expensive option because reasonable costs for 18 -21 years (depending on the state) has to be calculated and that amount initially deposited into the trust fund.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Stormyweather:
<strong> Some states won't even give sole custody unless the situation falls under the "detrimental to child" category like in cases of abuse, certain criminal activities or abandonment. Most states are starting to lean towards automatic joint custody agreements.

As far as termination of rights, in most states this only happens if someone else is petitioning to adopt the child. Otherwise, the state is not going to terminate rights because of the possibility of the state having to pay to raise the child if the custodial parent can't manage on their own. But I have heard of some cases in which it was allowed in which the custodial parent was financially well off to raise the child on their own (and it was well documented) or cases where the noncustodial parent set up a substantial trust fund in which money could be pulled monthly and all contact was through the noncustodial parent's lawyer or manager of the trust fund. I understand this could be a very expensive option because reasonable costs for 18 -21 years (depending on the state) has to be calculated and that amount initially deposited into the trust fund. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Storm again I agree with you. Although when the person request to have no contact then the mother is given sole/legal custody. The courts don't like it, but they can only make someone pay cs, they can't make a parent be a parent.

<small>[ December 04, 2004, 12:15 PM: Message edited by: needtomoveon ]</small>

I can only speak from my experience in which Mr.T gave ex-ow sole care and custody. Yes, we pay a bit higher child support for that, but to establish the no contact that he wanted, he agreed to pay a slightly higher amount.

One cannot, like the other say, just give up rights unless the mother asked the father to and has a step-father or such willing to adopt and take on the responsibilities of raising the child. The courts will still make sure the Father pays so as to avoid further costs of the mother possibly having to go on state assistance blah blah blah....

But I would check with a family law attorney and your own state's laws on whether or not you can legally terminate your visitation. Worse comes to worse, even if you are listed as having joint custody you are not obligated in anyway to pursue visitation.

Hope you find a situation that works best for you and your marriage.

Twiisty

Although when the person request to have no contact then the mother is given sole/legal custody. The courts don't like it, but they can only make someone pay cs, they can't make a parent be a parent.

Not me, darn it. I got sole legal custody because my ex made it known that he was willing to give up his parental rights so I asked for this so I wouldn't have to track him down and make him talk to me to make any important decision but joint physical custody. The judge figured he might come to his senses one day and actually want to exercise his rights to visitation. Not likely, if you ask me. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

<small>[ December 04, 2004, 12:45 PM: Message edited by: Stormyweather ]</small>

stromy the judge told us that if he changes his mind he would have to come through the courts and ask permission and file approiate paperwork etc. but I also could file my paperwork to rebudle it.

Downandout34

This what I did when I first found out.

1. I filed for a separation with my lawyer.(My H was frantic...he really thought I was going to axe him..in reality..I was protecting our assets)
2. Then I filed for CS for my children/ Alimony for me and we had all our assets signed over to my parents.
3. We set up paternity testing immediately, the day the baby was born.
4. And we set up legally that she could not contact us for anything..only through my lawyer.
5. With our crazy OW we were force to take primary custody of the OC.