This is not meant to be offensive to anyone person. No one in my close family has ever served in the millitary so I just don't understand it.

Are A's so common because the spouses are apart so much? And can having an A actually affect your career or is it having the OC that is the kicker? What happens to the OW's career too if she in the millitary too? Are A's so easy because even an "average" looking man looks HOT in a uniform? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

My Bro-in-law was in the navy and had a GF of 5 years that he screwed around on constantly. But they weren't a good couple to begin with.

I know you can't control who you fall in love with but I've learned to avoid millitary men, police and firemen if I were to be out there dating again.

Again no offense meant, just want a little more insight into millitary marriages.

I know what you mean....I'm the same way. I avoid men in that field as well. Not that they are all like that, but it seems like alot are. I think they have ego problems. Here at my job is a guy who is a part time cop and I think he is having an EMA with my co worker. He's married with children and yet he's always taking her out to lunch or they are talking on the phone.. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

Now I am pursing a law enforcement career myself, but I think it's the men who have affairs in this field more than woman.

My H is in the navy and the OW is too. They both lost a rank therefore, she is getting kicked out in June. My H still will be in but it really messes up with his progress with many it up the chain. As for the OW, this is her SECOND A with a married navy man........my H has never been away so we aren't apart. I am not sure though why they are so "normal" in the military. I know they happen ALL THE TIME...Honestly a lot of men I have met in the navy have a mentality of not caring therefore screwing around means nothing to them (the ones I've met)..

My husband is also in the service. I can't say that being away frequently is the reason for military men having affairs as much of lack of communicaton in general. Communication is very important in any relationship as you know but it's especially important when facing deployments, training schools and other aspects that cause you to part. My husband did have an A while he was away from home however, it was with his high school girlfriend in their hometown. Many service members do cheat and have a's but many spouses do the same thing and I thing it all comes down to peoples needs being unmet. But many times these needs that are unfufilled are never expressed so thus we are back at communication.

I agree with Calismile: unmet needs/communication, and OPPORTUNITY

Frequent periods of short and long separations (from any job) wear hard on ANY relationship, and give both spouses opportunity and incentive to cheat without the spouse knowing... that goes for the deployed AND the one left home. I know of wives that lived with boyfriends during husband's deployment. Not big percent, but definately happening.

Also, the intense demands of firefighting, military, and police service make an emotional overload that can spill into an affair with a co-worker. I knew a retired NY cop that told me this; he'd had multiple affairs.

However, my military H's OC was conceived during an at-home time and had more to do with our infertility and communication problems at the time.