Has anyone found about about an A that resulted in an OC years later?

In 2003 I got a phone call informing me about an A my H had in 1989.

During the same phone call I was told to tell my H he could possibly be the father of twins who at the time were 13 years old.

I was just wondering if this has happened to anyone else?

Me.
My H had an affair for 11 yrs. I had no clue.
found out from the IRS.
When I found out my stepson was almost 7. He will be 10 next month.
My story is in the archives somewhere. I dont know how to get to it.
We are still married. We do have contact.
I will be glad to help if I can.

Lori

Did your husband know about this child?

OW had twins a boy and a girl.

She married "who she thought the father was"

when OC's were 13 years old OW's XH had DNA tests they were not his.

After I got the phone call my husband took DNA tests he is the bio dad.

My husband never had a clue.

Now OW is acting like her life is a mess because of me and my husband.

Why blame us? I know he had the affair with her but she is the one who married someone else and told him they were his.

I just can not understand why someone would lie to their children about who they are.

She probably thought her XH was their father...at that time.

Since you state that it was her X who had DNA testing done, with the end result being that those twins were not his, she is probably mad at the world. Don't take it personaly or worry about it.

Is her X not paying child support now? Are you? Are you having visitation with the twins? If you are, that could be bugging her. Maybe she is mad that the X is not the father and is lashing out at you two? Bottom line, her being angry at you and him is her problem, don't lose sleep over it. Imagine how shocking and embarrassing this is for her. Imagine having to tell this to your children? God how sad. I guess it is a tough lesson in honesty.

What is happening now, with you and your husband is what matters. I am assuming that since you were told in 2003, that you are him are staying together and you have worked this out. Good for you!

What is the status of your relationship with the twins? Are they upset by all of this? Is their "dad (OWXH) still in contact with them?

Wow, this is a tough road for everyone involved. Do you have children with your husband?

I am wondering, and you don't have to rehash this if you don't want to, but how did you two work this out? Counseling?

I think if you read around here, you will be able to decipher how and why ow get mad at MM/BW. I am a poster child for their anger... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> But I feel that they get mad at the couple for moving on and healing, and it sounds like her life is ripped apart at the seams. Short of asking her what her problem is, you will never really know.

After I got the phone call H looked her up and asked her if it was a possibility. She said yes he may be the biofather. She said but since it's twins he may be the father of one and someone else could be the father of ther other she said if she slept with two men in 24 hours "it could be a sperm cocktail".

When my husband's DNA results came back we met with her and she said she wanted support and she didn't want to go to court she wanted to handle it between us. (I wanted to do everything legally.)I wrote out an agreement we agreed to the amount she set she wanted the same amount she was getting from her XH. She didn't want to handle it in the courts because her son also received SSI.

Her son was then in a mental facility because he tried to kill his mother and sister with a knife.

Her XH went back to court and he was told he didn't have to pay child support anymore. Then she called and wanted more from us and we said no because we had an agreement.

The daughter beat her up not long after test results came back and she called and left a message on the machine saying it was my husband's turn. she called back and left another message that said she had the daughter arrested.

She doesn't embarrass.

We paid her every week for a year and then she went to Child support enforcement and now we are going to court.

My husband and I have been in MC. It has been very hard for me. We have a daughter who is 19 and it has been very had on her too.

We have no contact with the OC's. My H feels like they have a father, he never knew about them, they are strangers. They are very messed up. The girl was taken away a couple of months ago by the court she now lives with her mother's sister.

I never knew her and I never knew about this affair but she blames me for everything.

I have talked to the XH and he lies as much as she does. My husband lied alot when I first found out. Sometimes I feel like I don't know who or what to believe.

OW told me my husband should have ended up with her. My husband and other people who knew about this say it was just a drunken thing. She is making it out to be they were so in love.

She swear to GOD and swears on her chidren's lives and then she lies.

She really is trash.

charlotte,

I'm sorry for your pain. Don't let xow get to you too much---obviously you guys didn't know all these years! Legally, her ex is probably still financially liable for them, since he's been their "father" all these years; there's usually a time limit to challenging paternity.

My cousins were approached by my uncle's teen OC when they were in high school. OC knew about them and her bio-dad, but they did not know about OC. He had died several years before, and she was just curious about him/them. My Dad saw OC a couple times to see pictures and chat, then she faded away.

Welcome to the board.
Hugs,
J
in recovery 6+y and glad I stayed.

Thank you Jenny.

We are going to court o the judge can legally decide who the legal father is.

OW is a maniac. She has threatened me and my daughter who she has never met.

She has really screwed her kids lives up.

Now after all of this time she expects my husband , me and our daughter to be happy about all of this and welcome her and her kids into our lives.

I asked her why she played GOD with so many lives and she said because it was her right to do so.

Charlotte, the psychiatric term for her is "narsacist" I believe (sp?). She's all about me-me-ME and she's totally screwed her kids up! How sad <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

I'd stay waaaay clear of the whole crew!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> I super-hope you guys are vindicated in court due to the time limits. Ouch. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

Whoa! WHAT a mess! YOU poor thing. Focus on your marriage.

Why would she expect you gusy to welcome HER into yoru famioy. SHe is nothing to your family.

SOunds like her family was messed up WAY before you gusy came along. Have you gotten a restraingin order against her for her threats towards you & your daughter? If not, you should.

Make sure the judge knows about that.

Document everything. Avoid any & all C w/ her. THere is no need for that. ANything worth discussing can be done in court. DO you ahve an attorney?

Take care of yourself.
hugs....
kt

Thank you.

Yes my H does have an atty.

I appreciate all of the support.