Have any of you heard of subliminal messages? I have a booklet (junk mail flyer) that has a list of subliminal tapes that can be ordered. The list includes tapes made especially for stores to increase sales, restaurants to make people order more expensive items on the menu, and a long list of other tapes.<P>The one that caught my interest is a tape that is for making a person fall in love with you. You don't have to do anything except play the tape so the person can hear it in your presence. <P>The tapes use a "back masking" system that makes them silent. The tape can be played and the message is delivered even tho it can't be heard.<P>I've noticed that OW has many men hanging onto her even tho she is a ugly and bossy woman. There has to be some reason the men can't resist her. Maybe she's using one of these tapes? Maybe one of these flyers showed up in her mailbox and maybe she ordered the tape. <P>I know I'm sounding paranoid, but I'm desperate to find a reason why my loving H would start acting like a teenager chasing after OW even in the presence of her H.<P>I have been in contact with the company that sells the tapes and one employee has assured me that the silent tapes do get the desired results (money back guarantee). (they say the message enters thoughts threw repetition)<P>Also, that they do a large volume of sales, both business and private sales. (most of the sales are to large chain stores to improve retail sales)<P>Does anyone have any knowledge of this? What do you think? Am I in fantasy land with this one?<P>Keo<p>[This message has been edited by Keosha (edited February 03, 2000).]

Yes, you are in fantasy land.<P>You want to know why these outfits sell so many tapes? Because they are selling FALSE HOPE to people like you -- the betrayed, the lovelorn, the people at the end of their rope who don't know what to do.<P>Much research (all of it inconclusive) has been done about subliminal messages.<P>It's more likely that OW has some sort of gift for making men feel cherished, despite the fact that she's "old and bossy", as you say. She probably has a lot of self-confidence, too, or at least PROJECTS that. Dragon Lady is like that...she's not much younger than I am, and she's not that attractive, but she carries herself with great confidence, and she flirts with every man who comes down the pike.<P>There's no mystery. There's no subliminal tapes at work here. If you want to see why OW has men falling over her, WATCH HER.<P>Save your money. Remember, a fool and his money are soon parted.

Hmmm...How can I put this? Okay, let me just say i think you already know the answer. The company that you read this from is a hoax. Think about it Keosha, if God gave us free will, how is it that we can force anyone to love us. Let alone by silent tapes. Sounds a little absurd, well not a little: IT'S UNREAL.<P>I know what you are feeling. You want to do anything to save your marriage. And I encourage you to do so, but please don't get caught up in this subliminal message 'tape' thing. Stick with the principles here. Your doing fine. <P><P>------------------<BR>"If you can learn from the mistakes of others, you won't have to make them youself."<P>lady_divine77@yahoo.com

<BR>Keosha,<P>Yikes, don't fall for the subliminal message tape thing. There's a psychologist at the University of Washington named Tony Greenwald who reported a study in Psychological Science sometime around 1991. His paper discussed a carefully conducted double-blind, placebo-controlled investigation of the effectiveness of different kinds of subliminal tapes. None of them worked at a level above the placebo. The data are clear: Save your money and don't buy such tapes.<P>That said, Greenwald has shown that there really are ways to produce "subliminal" effects. His research has generally used word-priming paradigms. For example, its easier (and faster for people) to recognize the word "butter" if it follows the word "bread" than if it follows the word "truck." By reducing the exposure time to the prime word to milliseconds, and exposing the prime word to only the non-dominant eye, he's been able to show that priming effects outside of conscious awareness can be obtained in the lab. Btw, these findings would be very unlikely to extend to the urband legend about movie theaters using a subliminal frame of popcorn inserted in a film in order to drive up popcorn sales. The reason is that the subsequent film images would serve as what's known as an "energy mask," and would preclude the image from reaching the neocortex.<P>Bystander<P>

Let's see if I get this straight: People pay good money for tapes that sound "silent" because they have been "masked"? Oh my. I've heard of some pretty interesting scams, hydrotherapy being one of the best, but this one is great! I think I'm going to start selling something like this! Anybody want to buy some tapes? $19.99 plus shipping and handling cash only please! Just let me know what you want to happen, and I'll make you a tape!

OK, you've reassured me. I won't sneak into her house in the middle of the night and use a hammer on her tape player. <P>I never really believed it would be possible, but like I said, I am trying to understand why my loving H (age 60) would start acting like a teenager again. <P> Also how he can be so blind to making such a fool out of himself.

How? Easy. He's 60. He can no longer delude himself that he's a kid. He can't face growing old -- loss of power, loss of potency, loss of employability, and he thinks a young[er] chickie will make him younger. <P>It's quite common. Call it insanity, call it midlife crisis, call it what you will. It's an unwillingness to go gently into that good night.<P>You know, I wonder if having sown some wild oats in one's youth helps that or hurts. My H was the World's Oldest Living Rebellious Adolescence, and he's had very little trouble with mourning his lost youth in his 40's.

Nope, not a younger woman. OW is 15 years older than me! She's slightly older than him. <P>I can't see any EN that she's filling. <P>Maybe he sees her as a mother replacement?<BR>

Keosha,<P>She was available! That and she is acting the role of loving supporter. <P>Why all of the sudden dependable loving people start acting like teen-agers is something I think we would all like to know.<P>Hang in there! Also I can't imagine that company is really selling subliminal tapes to businesses because it is illegal or was the last I heard.

Keosha; <BR> Let me tell you from experience that they don't work. I bought several years ago, one called Healing your Relationship, I even found out the words used in them, (I didn't want to find out later that I've been talked into commiting some crime) I would play it at night when H was asleep it would usually wake him up (he's a sound sleeper) and he would ask what was going on. HMMM Maybe they did work but his subconscious was too strong for them and would alert him to the fact that I was trying to change his behavior! Seriously I did try that one and several others but didn't help. Sorry! I know at this point we are all looking for a magic bullet. <P>------------------<BR>Peg