Lori, <BR>Was off all weekend and got up this AM and read your post...how wonderful for you!!! I did the best I could do in Plan A, but know I failed at times...but you have done the best Plan A and it seems it is payng off!! Congrats!!<P>------------------<BR>Susan<P><BR>

Susan - not perfect, but something paid off. Thanks so much for the good wishes!<P>Lori

Lori,<P>I am so happy for you!!!! I am dancing and crying at the same time!!!! You are a true role model. In future refrences to plan A I will tell all newbies to do a search under user name "lostva". Thanks for giving such a postive element to the boards. You are the best. We always knew he would come around, how could he resist!!!<P> [img]http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/grin.gif[/img] [img]http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/grin.gif[/img] [img]http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/grin.gif[/img] [img]http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/grin.gif[/img] [img]http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/grin.gif[/img] <P>------------------<BR>Love and Prayers<BR>Nicole [img]http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/smile.gif[/img]<p>[This message has been edited by Patient Love (edited January 31, 2000).]

Now, Nicole, if you say that to the poor newbies, all they'll think is that they're supposed to be nuts too!!!!! <P>Thanks for the warm thoughts (and the dance!) Wish I had a video of everyone's happy dance!!!! <P>There's still lots to be done, but he DID call again today and started off with "Hey Good Lookin'!" When I said just sittin' here thinkin' 'bout you he answered with "I've been thinking about you, too. More and more every day." I just cried! Later of course!!! Keep your fingers crossed for us, but I think we're heading in the right direction!!<P>Lori

Lori<BR> <BR>My money was on you from the start <BR>Didn't I say that once before?<BR>Hang in there girl!<BR>You've got way too much sunshine on your side to be anything but a winner!

Yeah, Wassi, as usual, you're right again!! And boy am I glad you were this time!! <P>Just got my second call for the day. And another "I love you". Sorry....I just can't hear it enough!<P>Thanks a lot. I've learned an awful lot from you, you know!<P>Lori

Lori,<P>I still have tears of joy for ya...<P>2 I Love You's..great..<P>Bill<P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

Thanks, Bill. I'm more excited than a teenager!!! I'm ready for all the work now. Not quite ready for him to come home, but ready to rebuild!!<P>Lori

Hey, Lori,<P>I keep coming back here to read 'cause it makes me so darn happy!!!!! <P>Desiree<P>------------------<BR>"Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindnesses and small obligations, given habitually, are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."<P>Sir Humphry Davy<BR>

So any words of wisdom for me? I hope that I can be as strong as you have been.Way to go!

Desiree - Hi, Sweetie! I keep coming back too 'cause I can hardly believe it myself!! Thanks for being there.<P>Rcoaster - from me? words of wisdom? All the wisdom is here and in your heart, you know? You've got a tough battle (read your profile and some of your posts). My good thoughts and prayers are with you. Just remember, nothing is impossible! I'll say just one thing (ok, I HAD to!). I really believe that, most all the time, this job is easier if they stay at home b/c you have the time with them to Plan A. I mean, I may have seen or talked to him 4 times in 4 months after he left. But, in retrospect, it worked better for us that he could leave and have the time to sort out what was in his head and his heart. Helped me in a sense as well...I did some SERIOUS soul-searching and tons of that blasted "personal growth" stuff! Also, since it was't constantly in my face, so to speak, it was easier not to lb. There's no magic formula. I was lucky. But the growth thing helped. The first words of change to his family weren't "I love and miss Lori", but "I really like the person that Lori's become". That speaks VOLUMES for Plan A, I think. Hang in there RC, we're all pulling for you, too!<P>Thanks for the encouragement, guys.<P>Lori

Lori,<P>I had to come out of hiding for this!<P>You know that silly dance that the Rams did in the end zone? I'm doing that inside my head, just for you! (My kids would think I'd flipped if I was that energetic this early in the morning).<P>So, so happy for this news ...take it slow, savor the NEW marriage, build it one brick at a time so it can withstand the inevitable storms of life.<P>We are doing great! I can still be reached through the Women's Bible Study forum.<P>love and prayers<BR>Liz\pearl<P>------------------<P>"I have found the Pearl of Great Price"<BR><p>[This message has been edited by POGP (edited February 01, 2000).]

Thanks, Liz, you've been one of my role models!! I'm looking so forward to this. And enjoying all the attention he's given me these last few days. Feel like a teenager!<P>Lori

Hi! Just thought I'd give you guys an update! (I haven't posted twice in one week in AGES!! )<P>Well, so far, so good. Several calls a day, I love you's coming each time. A few conversations (he brought them up) about some of the "issues" he's dealing with, fears, guilt, etc. and on to some of mine. They're great conversations. Comfortable and easy, believe it or not. <P>I'm still nuts, but I sorta was b/f, so no big deal. We're making plans for the new house and working on this one again this weekend (although we sorta skipped that LAST weekend!). Making decisions together again, and that feels really good.<P>Sorry, just had to share it. Helps me to believe that it's really starting to happen.<P>Luv you guys.<P>Lori

Have not been around at all in the last two months, just checked in today to see what's been happening. I followed so much of your story last fall and this is the best news ever! What a testimony to Plan A principles and your understanding of them I am sooooo happy for you. Keep up the good work. See you on the "in recovery" board soon!

Your Post just keeps getting better & better! I'm happy for you!

Thanks, guys. <P>PW - wondered just the other day how you were doing. I'm not around very much anymore, just a little. I will LOVE joining the recovery board!<P>No Trust - thanks for checking back in. I didn't know I could even FEEL like this again!!<P>Lori

Lori,<BR>I haven't been here in about a week and just popped in to see what was happening. And I'll be darned if I don't get some of the best news ever. I am so happy for you. You deserve this. <P><P>------------------<BR>God Bless you and yours,<P>Sheryl W.<P>www.widesmiles.org/gallery/britanie<BR>

Sheryl, thanks! It's so nice to be able to post something good! <P>Lori

Lori; Since I'm a Newbee, I haven't gotten to read all your postings, but when I read this one I laughed, I cried and did my own happy dance, (kids were at school) so only the dog looked at me crazy! So now I come to my questions(oh wise one..) I guess I have misunderstood Plan A. I thought when they (meaning H) left home for OP you go to plan B? From your posts you were still doing Plan A even tho he was out of the house, since i've taken the blinders off I have been tring to Plan A for maybe about 18 mons. He just became more sneakie and I told him I can't live this way anymore so I asked him to leave, but not to insult me and move in with OW. It has been 2 weeks since I asked him to leave, he's still here but I know Of one day he looked around for an apartment, when he told me I cried and didn't want to hear anymore. So he is going around depressed and we hardly talk to each other except about surface stuff (like things in the news) I try not to LB and when I do I apoligize and I'm tring to keep things the way <BR>I think he likes them. When I said to him a year ago that I was doing all these things that he liked he just said " I noticed" and that was it. I feel if he would just leave I could begin to recover myself worth and maybe he would see me in a better light and she wouldn't be so appealing, even tho I found out it has been going on for more than 6 years, I thought it has been only about 3..... When I found out that people at his work have known for 6(I repeatly asked him who knew) he wouldn't answer me. Someone else told me. I wanted to tell him I knew that for 6 yrs they have been talking about him at work but I didn't cuz I figured that would be a LBer. So now do I suck up the Depression and hurt feelings and try to make his last days plesant? ( I would really like to make him as uncomfortable as possible but that is a LB)But I also don't want him to have his cake and eat it to. If he doesn't leave soon do I ask him when is he planning to? I don't want to pressure him but I feel all the years of betreyal( he was getting absolutely ridculous in his sneakieness) and the way I can't seem to keep the hurt out of my eyes and voice, that I can't begin to heal if I have to see him every night. I want him to stay but work to be back together, he doesn't want that. I finally am going to counseling on Tues. but I don't know this persons approuch. (Can't afford to call Dr. Harley.) So I guess I'm just asking for some feedback, even tho you don't know my full history, I don't have enough Internet time for that. Hearing the latest news in your story helps me to believe in good things again. <P>------------------<BR>Peg