I just posted this on the women's bible study a couple of days ago, and thought that it would do for my friends in this forum to share in my joy. Please read on...<P>Hi Everyone!<P>I remember some of you, but not all... Let me re-introduce myself: I'm Carrie, and I last posted on the Infidelity forum, probably about a year and a half ago. I was so glad to see this book discussion going on, and I'm going to read it with you guys. I'm happy to report the I have great things to tell you all. PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO READ THIS IF YOU NEED SOME ENCOURAGEMENT. I'll try to make it as brief as possible.<P>Not quite 2 months after we were married, my H began an affair with a co-worker. I began getting suspicious. I friend gave me "his needs, her needs" and I read it cover to cover in 2 days, trying to figure out his behavior, so I knew what was going on before he told me. I knew he was lying to me, but had to wait until I had proof to confront him. That opportunity came to me, and I did. I thought everything was destroyed and that I was going to leave, but my H agreed to quit<BR>work if they would not allow him to switch shifts (he was working nights). We went in to his boss together. Evidently, most of the office knew what was going on, which hurt me very badly, since we were friends with most of them (and witht the OW). His boss said<BR>that he needed him at work and that he could switch shifts. This gave me some relief, but not a lot, since I knew they'd still see each<BR>other at shift changes. We continued counselling with the couple from church, and eventually, had to go to a professional. In the midst of all of this, I decided to test the waters a little, and to do something for myself. I applyed to graduate schools outside of the city in which we lived. Really, it was that I couldn't stand being in that city any more, and him working at that job any more. It was tearing me up inside, and I was finding it really hard to forgive him. My H also put me into a social situation with the OW about 3 months after I found out about the affair. I thought my heart was being ripped out of my chest. I figured that if I got in to grad school, he would come if he wanted me, and stay if he wanted her. Even<BR>though the affair was over, and he was trying his very best to be truthful and always keep me informed, I had bigtime doubts. I got<BR>accepted to graduate school, and wondered what his reaction would be. As soon as I told him, within 10 minutes, he was on the internet looking for jobs in that city. **He found a job, told his job that he was leaving, found a house for us to rent, and was setting up our new home in a new town before I could even finish the contract with<BR>my job. <P>He moved in May, and I moved in June to join him. We had our first anniversary in June in our new home, and it really was a fresh start! Soon after that, about a year after I found out about the affair, I heard the words, "I forgive you," come out of my mouth, and I realized that I really meant it. We cried together, and vowed that we would always think of one another before ourselves.<P>We started looking for a church, and reading and studying the bible, "for real," not relying on any other source (pastors, parents -both dads are ministers-, books, frineds, etc.), but only on God's word. We realized that we had never honored the conmittment that we had made to God when we were so young, and that really, no committment was ever made on our own. We decided to follow God's word, reestablish our beliefs, repent and be baptized. And we did that just three weeks ago. I can't tell you what it meant to me to see this change take place in my husband, to see him be baptized, AND to do the same myself, and have my husband baptize me! <P>We have really come full circle in a year and a half! We are now BOTH full time students and are trying to live on 2 part time jobs.<BR>We're poor, but very happy! To me, my H is the most loving man on the planet now, and my trust in him is being restored. Our marriage is better than ever, and will continue to get better and better over the years! We are looking forward to having a Godly household for many many years, and we're even getting excited about having babies in a few years.<P>To all of you out there who are still struggling in your marriage: Befaithful to God first, and then your husband. Pray. Reevaluate yourrelationship with the Lord. Read the Bible as if it's the first time<BR>you've ever read it, and encourage your husband to do the same.Remember that God's word is the final authority, and that you are hischild. I know what it feels like for forgiveness to seem so far away, but it can happen! And it does. Your marriage can be better than ever! I never thought I would be writing this a year and a half ago, but here I am. It can happen for you, too.<P> Carrie.<P> 1 Peter 4:8 "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers<BR> over a multitude of sins."<BR>

Thank you Carrie,<P>Your words are a great encouragement and I appreciate your stopping back in to share them with us.<P>Repenting<P>------------------<BR>Fear God and you will have nothing else to fear<P>Hosea 3

Carrie,<P>Thank you... <P>Boy do we need these stories... <P>Jim

Carrie,<P>Thank you for shareing your story..<P>I now have to get a tissue....<P>Thanks,<P>Bill<P><BR>"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed." Proverbs 16:3<BR><P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

Carrie - that's wonderful!! <P>Lori

Carrie, <BR>How wonderful for you!! Thanks for coming back and sharing.....too often we forget just how many success stories there are out there.......just keep your faith and the good Dr. Harleys principles firmly in front of you...you will always have a wonderful marriage!!!<P>------------------<BR>Susan<P><BR>