Have you seen the recent tv commercial for Britannica.com (the online encyclopedia)? On the topic of marriage, Coppula is stating the case for making marriage work.<P>He says that in talking with his men friends who have been married 2, 3, or 4 times, that they ALWAYS say the first wife was the best. He said he can't speak for women because he has never discussed this with them, but that the men do say the first wife was the best.

Barbara Walters says you have 3 marriages in your life...the 1st one you have kids with, the 2nd one you have sex with...and the 3rd one is your companion.

Sorry to disappoint everyone. But, I was always of the belief that you marry once, and for life. Better make a good choice the first time!<P>Now, with that said... Why are we all here?<P>--keystone

I loved the message that it sent. With our current divorce rate maybe it will get through to a few people who call it quits before they've ever really tried to make it work. <P>Yesterday, I caught the tale end of Oprah and (oh I've blanked on his name. The hispanic talk show host that used to be a lawyer) was on talking about his affair, and how some say it makes their marriage better, but he doesn't believe that. He believes that it leaves a wound that can never be healed. While I can agree that it certainly does change the marriage, I don't know if I'd be as pessimistic as to say it's this huge gaping wound that never heals. I think it's more like a wound that heals into a scar. Some of my scars are barely noticeable. Just a slight discoloration of the skin. I can live with that.

In my heart, I believe marriage is forever. I waited 7 years to marry my H to be sure we were right for each other. My H was ready and so was I. I feel we are dealing with this affair because we didn't have the skills to avoid it the first time around. I believe "if" we get through this, we will go on to stay together forever. Maybe its just my fantasy but its all I have.<P>Don't forget in all the statistics, that half of all people divorce. But a lot of people remarry the same person, so that should account for something. <P>Also, I don't think many of us can ever love anyone as much as our first love/first husband. If you aren't in an abusive relationship, and you look at the people here who have been betrayed, it shows just how much love we have. Yes, to stay together after the affair, will be hard, it will be painful, there will be scars, BUT we can use our newfound skills to make our marriage work just as good. Going on to marriage number 2, with no history, no true bond, we will still have scars from being betrayed anyhow. <P>Hurray for Francis!! I know I will always be THE BEST!!<BR>