Our pastor and his wife plan to meet with my wife tomorrow at noon (Eastern Time). Please keep this meeting in your prayers.<P>Has anyone had a spouse turn after a meeting like this. I do not have high hopes but at least he can share some truth with her.<P>T2

I am sorry that I do not have any information about this. That she is willing to go is a good sign? My thoughts and prayers are with you.<P>Forever

Redwood trees started from a seed.....<P>Try to set your hopes on a realistic level....that a seed of truth will be planted and that she will allow God to bring it to full growth.<P>------------------<BR>"They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings as eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint." Isaiah 40:31<P>

Triumph2<P>My H met with our Pastor a few weeks after he left me to live with OW. They chated but I have no idea what was actually said. The end result is that it had no affect, or none that I could see, on my H's desicion to stay with OW.<P>Our Pastor is Lutheran but fairly untradtional. He himself is divorced and remarried. I remember his advice to me at the time was to give H a time limit to make up his mind and stick to it. His words were, "You deserve a whole loaf not half a loaf."<P>I hope your Pastor and his wife have better luck with your W.<P>My prayers are with you and her.<P>Fingers Crossed

My H met with our minister back in September when his affair (ended mutually he said) the 1st time. He was there for 2 hours, said it helped a bit but he NEVER went back to church after that. I thought he was to embarrased to go after that. Our minister is fairly young and married with kids and he was a great help to me. Unfortunately the affair is back on again, my H has moved out and our minister has been posted to a church in another city. I asked H awhile ago why he didn't go to church anymore and he said the minister refused to help him and he feels abandoned by GOD. I asked if the minister was willing to help if he ended the affair and all H said was 'maybe'. All in all, I hate to disappoint you but it didn't help us. It will most likely depend on how faithful to God your spouse is and how the pastor reacts. My hopes are with you.

My husband talked by telephone to our pastor the first separation. H didn't like what he heard. Stopped going to church.<P>Second separation, he talked to him again. Pastor advised me to get a divorce. I didn't.<P>Haven't seen my pastor since 96, as I moved to MN to be with H. Wonder how things will go, we go back to CA in May for my son's wedding. Our pastor will perform the ceremony. Now my husband is trying to find a way to back out of the wedding.<P>I think that sometimes the truth hurts.<P>

Update... Meeting cancelled and rescheduled for next Tuesday at noon. I hope she keeps the new appointment but since she feels very convicted just going into church I am not sure she will. I pray God will grant her repentence!<P>Thanks for your responses!!!!<P>

My pastor and several men from the church tried to talk to my ex. He listened to what they had to say and wouldn't reply to anything. Don't get your hopes up over this one. My ex was a Sunday School teacher, a youth director, and had been nominated to be a deacon when he did this. When they are deeply into the affair, nothing can sway them. I figured if our kids didn't move him, nothing would and I was right.<P>AD

T2,<P>My wife's meeting with the pastor and his wife set us back a little in our working together...See whirlwind/tornado (GQ) and 3rd Party (Just...) My wife felt like she was being judged and ended up reacting by resigning her position with the church. She says that she still wants to go to the same church, just does not want to be on staff. She lashed out at me saying that the pastor would try to get to her (talk) because I'm still a staff member of the church. <P>Just a thought...does your wife not want to go to any church or just yours? Please keep going to church with her if she decides to change churches. When you are both worshiping and seeking together there is a bond that cannot be broken.<P>Thanks for your responses to me. Prayers, feelings, and thoughts for you and with you.<P>Ed

Ed,<P>My wife told my she no longer want to go to church together. She mentioned going to some very liberal type churches... I asked if she would go to our more traditional and conservative chruch that we have been atteneding if I did not and she said she did not know if she would... The TRUTH is she doesn't want to feel convicted AND wants to have that time to be with the OM.<P>Her best friend from high school (she graduated in 1987) is also going through a divorce and it is like they are back in highschool again... talking about double dating and .... <P>Feel free to email me directly if you want to talk. triumph2@mail.com.

T2: My husband read a great book by Gary Smalley called "Winning Your Wife Back Before It is too late." Would be perfect for your situation. Talks about women who have emotionally left the marriage. <P>I think it would be better if just the pastor's wife or some other female could reach out to your wife to be a friend to meet with on a weekly basis so she could just talk. Not to tell her what she should do/think/etc, but just to listen to her. She may feel ganged up on, but could work if they show her compassion. <P>That is too bad about the friend getting the divorce. I think is the female 30+ crisis. When I was about that age, several of my friends from school got divorced around the same time, and they played the party girls. Here we are 10 years later, and their lives ARE NOT BETTER. They just created more problems for themselves. They should have tried to work on the ones they had. <P>Hang in there

Thanks Mariesue!<P>I appreciate the encouragement.