<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by KindaBlue:<BR><B>Another day on the emotional roller coaster today!!! The day was going good. My daughter was sick so I stayed home with her today. My W seemed very appreciative this morning and even thanked me and gave a few extra good-bye kisses before she left for work. She called me later and seemed like she was in a good mood.<P>When she got home things weren't too bad. Dinner was kind of hectic because my daughter was not feeling good and was very fussy. So, there was not much time to sit down and enjoy any conversation. <P>About an hour or so after dinner, things suddenly became sour. She was snapping at me for every little thing I did (she didn't think I loaded the dishwasher correctly, etc.). I kept my cool and kept reminding myself of plan A. I bit my tongue the whole night and did not say a word. <P>I also noticed that she did not have her wedding rings on today. There are days in her job when she does not wear them (she runs the kitchen in a nursing home and there are some days when they are short staffed that she has to wash dishes, cook, etc.), but today was not one of those days. This is the first time I noticed this on days when she is not in the kitchen.<P>I just get to the point where I can't take it anymore. Just when I thought my emotions were stable for a day, I get kicked in the gut again!! How much of this am I supposed to take?!?<P>Somebody please post a Plan A that was successful!!!!!!!! I guess I need to be reassured that all of this is worthwhile!<P>Doug<BR> <BR></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>KindaBlue,<P>I do have a somewhat happy ending. My H was very distant starting late Oct. 99. I did not know what was going on. Finally, Jan. 6th I got a call from the H of the ow. He was trying to reach my H to tell him to back off from his W. So, to make a long story short, My H intially lied to me and said he was giving her up (Internet affair, but did see her in person several times, including New Year's Day). I found out he was still in contact with her, and called a moving company. told him to give me an address, or else I would have it dumped off at her house! (sure her 4 kids would like that!) Anyway, I found MB just before the movers came. My H did not want to move, but certainly was not "Back". I told him that the only other option to not moving, was to do the Harley's plan and have NO, none, Nada contact. The Harley's really seem to have a grip on all this stuff. We have gone to counseling many times. Just talk, talk, discuss issues (what the heck does that mean? I never figured it out, and I was paying these peolpe $125 per Hour!)<P>Anyway, my H could really see the common sense the Harley book made. We have done telephone counseling with Steve (a bargin at $85 for a Full hour). We have made much progress, and are feeling closer than we have in a long time. We exchanged Emotional Needs Questionnarie this weekend. Next weekend it will be LB. So I am feeling very good right now. Unfortantely, my family (who supports me in whatever I want to do) thinks I am crazy. You see, this is the 3rd affair my husband has had. they also took him back 2 times. They feel burned (they were with us for a week at Christmas sking, and all he did was say he had work to do, constantly on the computer.) The whole time he was e-mailing her like mad. So, they have said "glad you are happier, that is what we want, but we are still mad at H." too bad I did not find the Harley's sooner. I really think for once in our 12 year marriage we might get it going as we (you, I and everyone on the planet) dream about.<P>I hope this helps you and gives you hope. You can do this. Seek guidance from the Harley's They really know their stuff, and are quick, quick to figure out where you are. (Wish my $125 people could have. It took them about 10 sessions just to get the history!)<BR>Best wishes, Victoria
