confusing story here, but I will try. back ground this is my 46th month (am i out of my mind!)since discovery of ow#1,18th month since discoverey of ow#2....4th month since discoverey that H was still calling ow#1...<BR>okay so this morning at work H recieved an obscure story via email from a mutual friend, he told me he really liked it, i read it said it was good. a little while later I get the same story from a friend of mine that works with ow#1, she just thought it was good. When i asked her where it came from she admitted it came from OW#1 even though she tries not to mention her to me.... Well in my mind it only makes sence that when H got it and liked it he somehow sent it to OW#1 via e mail, file serve, notepad who knows(we all work for the same co.) I told H that I am assuming he is guilty of contacting OW#1, that I do not believe in coincedences, and that if he wants to prove he is NOT guilty that is up to him...<BR>so my questions are..<BR>am I out of order<BR>am i getting carried away<BR>am I letting my imagination get away from me<BR>am I crazy for still waiting for him to get honest<BR>is there anyway that he can prove his honesty in this matter<BR>does it matter if he is lying or honest<BR>WHAT SHOULD I DO, I CAN NOT DO THIS WITH OUT MORE HELP FROM OTHERS.

lizam,<P>I'm sorry to say...<BR>I do think your out of order...<P>It will become harder and harder for your H to give you any chace of being honest if you make him prove he is innocent.<P>It doesn't mean he is innocent!<BR>But the guilt of his lying should hav to be enough.<P>You find him being more frustrated intrying to prove himself innocent... does OW#1 make him do this? Does OW#2?... Would OW#??<P>Of course it matters if he is lying or being honest... to force him though is a Love Buster.<P>Express your concern...<BR>Even express your fear that he started it...<BR>But let him know... he is loved!<BR>That's Plan A. Hard as it may be.<P>Prayers for your anguish! <P>Jim<P>

o<p>[This message has been edited by lizam (edited March 04, 2000).]

o<p>[This message has been edited by lizam (edited March 04, 2000).]

NSR thanks for the input.<BR>I am not demanding that he prove his innocense, but I told him that as far as I am concerned i believe that he isin contact with her.<BR>He had not made any moves to prove himself honest in this case, just a lot of swearing to God that he is telling the truth this time. He appears to be sweeping it under the rug{there is a big lump of crap under there} can anyone say conflict avoidance...<BR>SO WHAT DO I DO? I am tired of believing him and then getting thrashed upon with the hard facts every couple of months. I am tired of trying to prove to myself whats what. Plan A a few more years, or plan B because of suspicions?