On Thursday, she asked if I'd take her back. On Friday, she said she didn't know what she wants. Today, I confronted her and she told me she went and signed the papers for the D. I've been sitting here talking to a friend on IM and I see the OM signing on and off repeatidly. Must be waiting to talk to her.<P>She started reading SAA at my request, but tonight she told me that she wouldn't quit her job because they had been too good to her. Nice. Guess her job is more important than her marriage. Silly me. <P>I guess the good thing is that I don't have to live in limbo anymore. I was having a hard time deciding if I wanted to try last Friday after all she put me and the girls through. Now I don't have to wonder anymore.<P>I read a post from SamH about the roller coster ride his W has him on. All I can say is there is no way I can survive something like that. Your a better man than I Sam!! I suspect that this won't be the last time she has a change of heart, but I doubt I will let myself get taken again.<P>Say a prayer for me and my girls. I don't think she will move out knowing that I am going to fight her for custody of the girls. So welcome to our HE!!.<P>Brent

{{{{{{{{{{brent}}}}}}}}}},<P>I feel so bad for you...<BR>She raised your hopes... then crashed them!<P>At least my W has done very little to raise my hopes... for me it is a general down slope... with little up swings...<P>For you... that up and down jerking around is a terrible hell.<P>I'm praying for you and your girls... <BR>Please tell me you've started on the things I've recommended for your custody battle. Again... e-mail me if you like imherczeg@yahoo.com .<P> <P>Jim

Brentb,<P>We really are on the same time wave don't you think! Thursday my H said all those things, on Fri. "i can't do it."<P>I am really sorry to hear this. Boy was I down in the dumps today because of all of this it brings you right back to square one don't you think.<P>Im feeling better at this min., I sat down and started a journal, sobbing the whole time. Then I started with WHY I don't want H in MY life. I came up with 63 reasons. I wrote down 9 (I think) reasons why I want him in my life. Hmmmm big disparity there don't you think! <P>I also thought of him telling me that "Skanky ho's" husband had cheated on her so she was feeling guilty (this was a long time ago). HA!<P>I began my relationship with my H while he was still married. I thought it was over etc etc (the typical stuff). When I was divorced from my H, it was done and over with. Alot of baggage from that one also, lies etc but when I was over it I was over it period. I NEVER gave him mixed messages. Never once. Never once did either one of us think we would get back together.<P>Anyway, my H's X and I have been talking. I have apoligized to her for what I did, I told her I thought it was over etc. I will tell you this if ever a married man were to approach me again, the poor man. His wife would thank me, because I would give him an ear full. After going through this I cannot imagine putting someone through this EVER. <P>I never realized the hurt and pain that I caused. I can justify myself by saying I thought it was over, but NOW I realize that it wasn't. I should have said no thanks from the get go. I believe that this is my punishment for getting involved with a married man. Again I say I THOUGHT IT WAS OVER. I have learned so much since this has happened. If Skanky had gone through this SHE WOULD NEVER DO IT TO SOMEONE ELSE. <P>I don't know what I am going to do at this point and time. Wait I guess. Get stronger, I was reading in Torn Asunder to suggest a 90 day waiting period. My h would probably laugh in my face.<P>He's not speaking to me once again, or the voice is very cold, he called to today about the mail. Like it was MY fault what happened. Ya right. Guilt Guilt Guilt. Thats all I can keep saying. It has to eat them up. <P>Hang in there, my prayers are with you. Take care of yourself and your girls. REALLY take care of yourself. Do what you need to do for you. <P>Tracy

Brent,<P>Tracy brings up some good points. I too did the list she is talking about. Wow, 63 is a lot of reasons to say no Tracy! <P>I remember being where you are. It was January 27 to be exact. Two short months later, I no longer cry as much. I have my moments, but I am starting to have a life again.<P>Prayers to you and your little sweet hearts. Be sure to read my post today, your girls may experience what mine are.<P>Be strong, think positive and remember that life will get better. <P>Dana<BR>

Brent,<BR>You and your girls are in my thoughts and prayers.<BR>Viki

Brent: My prayers are with you. Don't let it drag you down too much. I am listening to a song right now, maybe before your time, but it does hit a chord. "The Beat Goes On" As life goes on. Take care of yourself and your kids.