Hi to all my closet friends,<P>I just wanted to take time out for a special "Thanks" to you all. I dont know what I would have done without this place. I know that God directed me to this site to end the affair and recover the marriage. There really isnt enough words to express the thanks that I have for all of you. This place is a blessing to me and my H. <BR>Going through withdrawal had been the pits. I think I am at the end of it though. I am finally thinking about H during the day. Every once in a while I will think about the OM. I know that is just Satan trying to weasel his way into this marriage. So just pray for strength. Im sure we are on the road to success. Im actually EXCITED!<P>As for the episode tuesday night. Hand I had dinner. I think he has finally found closure as well as myself. We discussed me lashing out at him. And all that stuff. He said he was just wondering. He knew deep in his heart that nothing happened. but, I told him to tell me whatever came to mind. He done just that. So I know there is a tiny bit of trust there. So I can build from that. <P>He also told me not to worry about bumping into the OM. That he has forgiven OM for what happened. And he would hang himself. He said "You do not mess with a married woman" And OM knew better. He would not lower himself to the level of OM. That he has his own issues there. He was sure there were memories there. But, I need to replace them with memories of us. When I seen OM truck, To think of the truck that H had when we were dating. His truck was just like it. <P>So we have no started the "nite nite" story. LOL! Every night we are ready SAA. That way we can both understand why this happened. To be honest Im not quiet sure why it happened. Except for the needs. PRAISE GOD he moved my family. <P>If you guys knew my H before all this. He would never ever attend church with me. I went through that for years. He was never involved like he is now. Im still trying to get about 35 pounds off. That of course was one of his first needs. He use to think that I looked better than Barbie. So im trying to get the back. And of course I just surprised him with highlights in my hair. he loves my natural red hair with blonde highlights. Before I totally contested doing my hair for him. Because it gave me no satisfaction. That may seem weird to you. but that is one of his needs.<P>I just request that you keep my family in your prayers. Our walk with God is getting better and better. Im looking forward to this challenge. I know there will be trying times that Satan is going to try to get in. I just pray for strength to see it. <P>I know this is a long one. I just wanted to give a little HOPE to all the spouses of the betrayers. I of course will be on here for help of the wayward. I just hope my story can impact atleast 1 person. To turn the life around and build the marriage again.<P>Of course Im here for you all to vent.<P>Love To All,<BR>Loopy Hamster Fanny<BR>(((((((((((((to all)))))))))))))))

Good for you woman! <P>I am so proud of you and very happy you are feeling better! <P>Keep in touch and continued good luck to you...

THANK YOU SISTER LACEE!!!! YOU HAVE HELPED A TON!!!!

inamess,<BR> God bless you sister!! God bless you!! There IS hope for us betrayed Husbands! Sometimes I wonder if it's harder for W to "come back" from this!! <BR> THANKS FOR THE GOOD NEWS!!<BR> GOOD LUCK & PRAYERS FRANK<P>P.S PRAISE ALMIGHTY GOD ABOVE ALL!!!<p>[This message has been edited by PLEASE HELP (edited April 22, 2000).]

Congrats.....<P>I am so happy for you and your husband.<P>Keep it up....you are almost there.<P>Best wished to the both of you<BR>Nancy

I am so happy for you and all that are on this board. It truly gives hope to us all and puts you back on the path of true happiness. <P>My hopes and prayers are for both you and your H. God bless you both and please keep the board informed.<P>J W

My wife had the affair and is now "forcing" me to move out for a 4 month "healing separation". It's good to know that as you re-established your relationship with God that you were able to re-establish your realtionship with your H. I pray that this also happens to my wife. I want nothing more than to address our shortcomings and rebuild our relationship. It's just SO HARD sometimes to continue on. She give little/no encouragement and sometimes my human weakness wins out and I feel like quitting.<P>Thanks for the encouragement and I pray for you both to always walk together.

Gonnatry,<BR> I am praying for you. Pray God puts it on her heart to get it together. <BR> Fill me in on your situation. Has she started the no contact policy? How long has this been going on?<BR>Prayers<BR>Renee

Gonnatry:<P>My situation sounds just like yours. My W is still having the affair and is pushing for separation. I am at a critical decision point, my story is Posted under "Need Some advice...at a critial point...". May be you can give me some advice.<P>Renee:<P>That is wonderful news about you and your H. It also gives me tremendous encouragement on pushing forward to restore my marriage. Perhaps you can read my post and give me some advice on what I should do. I know you can certainly give me some idea on what my W is thinking and trying to do.<P>JEC<BR><p>[This message has been edited by JEC (edited April 22, 2000).]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by inamess:<BR><B>Hi to all my closet friends,<P>I just wanted to take time out for a special "Thanks" to you all. I dont know what I would have done without this place. I know that God directed me to this site to end the affair and recover the marriage. There really isnt enough words to express the thanks that I have for all of you. This place is a blessing to me and my H. <BR>Going through withdrawal had been the pits. I think I am at the end of it though. I am finally thinking about H during the day. Every once in a while I will think about the OM. I know that is just Satan trying to weasel his way into this marriage. So just pray for strength. Im sure we are on the road to success. Im actually EXCITED!<P>As for the episode tuesday night. Hand I had dinner. I think he has finally found closure as well as myself. We discussed me lashing out at him. And all that stuff. He said he was just wondering. He knew deep in his heart that nothing happened. but, I told him to tell me whatever came to mind. He done just that. So I know there is a tiny bit of trust there. So I can build from that. <P>He also told me not to worry about bumping into the OM. That he has forgiven OM for what happened. And he would hang himself. He said "You do not mess with a married woman" And OM knew better. He would not lower himself to the level of OM. That he has his own issues there. He was sure there were memories there. But, I need to replace them with memories of us. When I seen OM truck, To think of the truck that H had when we were dating. His truck was just like it. <P>So we have no started the "nite nite" story. LOL! Every night we are ready SAA. That way we can both understand why this happened. To be honest Im not quiet sure why it happened. Except for the needs. PRAISE GOD he moved my family. <P>If you guys knew my H before all this. He would never ever attend church with me. I went through that for years. He was never involved like he is now. Im still trying to get about 35 pounds off. That of course was one of his first needs. He use to think that I looked better than Barbie. So im trying to get the back. And of course I just surprised him with highlights in my hair. he loves my natural red hair with blonde highlights. Before I totally contested doing my hair for him. Because it gave me no satisfaction. That may seem weird to you. but that is one of his needs.<P>I just request that you keep my family in your prayers. Our walk with God is getting better and better. Im looking forward to this challenge. I know there will be trying times that Satan is going to try to get in. I just pray for strength to see it. <P>I know this is a long one. I just wanted to give a little HOPE to all the spouses of the betrayers. I of course will be on here for help of the wayward. I just hope my story can impact atleast 1 person. To turn the life around and build the marriage again.<P>Of course Im here for you all to vent.<P>Love To All,<BR>Loopy Hamster Fanny<BR>(((((((((((((to all)))))))))))))))</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P><BR>God is truly GREAT!!! Keep praying continually and Satan will flee. Put on the full armour of God and Satan will lose every time. I am [raying for you and your family.<P>MONDO HUG!!!!!!!<BR><P>------------------<BR><B><I>God Bless,<BR>Rob</I></B><BR> regilmor@swbell.net

INamess,<BR>thanks for your post, <P>------------------<BR>jnvc

jnvc,<P>My pleasure. i just want people to know there is hope. It just takes time<P>Renee

Dear inamess,<BR>congrats! God has blocked Satan so far, GO GOD! I'm working to restore my marriage, which is in separation right now (H still involved with OW). So, your news was a dose of good medicine for me.<BR>What brought your husband into a closer relationship with Christ and the church? My once had an awesome relationship with Christ, but has wandered ever since we married 6 years ago. Just wondering what happened for you... I'm very involved at church and this affair has deepened my relationship with God intensely. Congrats, again!<BR>faithfulone

Faithfulone,<P>This affair thing made the difference. My H would not go to church with me. Until all this happened. We have only missed two Sundays this year. Once was for the race. The other to get teh work on the farm done. <P>i wish you the best. Hang tight! I promise the cloud will lift. He is in fantasy land right now. Just keep your faith in God!!!! I never thought that I could ever loe H again. God changed my mind. And he is changing alot of others. <P>Prayers to you <BR>Renee

It's been 2 months since D-Day. My wife had the affair (an EA as far as I know). He is a friend of us both (at least, a former friend of mine). I believe they have stopped seeing each other (he is also married and not ready to leave his family). My W stopped going to church some time ago and I have been a poor follower over the years. I recognize my own faults and responsibility in bringing us both to our current situation and desire only to rebuild and restore our intimacy. She is unsure of what she wants. We will separate for a period to allow us to clarify what we really want, to experience personal growth and do so in an envirnoment without pressure, confusion or coersion from the other. I feel that a separation is unnecessary for us to grow as individuals but she disagrees. I have agreed to move out but in my heart I fell that it's a mistake. She wrote to me once how she has wished for years that I would turn to God and how it took her sin to finally do so. I wrote back that it was not her sin but mine that has finally turned me towards Him. He abandoned me until I suffered enough to seek Him out (Hosea 5:15). We all expect unconditional love from our spouses and family but the only true love comes from God. No one else can forgive any sins we have so quickly and readily and all we have to do is ask. I have placed myself in His hands and pray for Him to protect and help my wife during this trying time.<P>I also realize now that the separation will prove to both of us that we are not dependent on each other for our existence. If we prove that, then our desire to remain together as husband & wife is truly genuine and not the result of "conditioning", habit or other false reasoning. I love my wife and wish to remain together. We may or may not. Either way, I will be a better person, father, friend and husband. I know this because I will never walk alone again. He will always be by my side.

Gonnatry,<P>My H just started church after the affair as well. I also wanted my H in church and he wouldnt go. I of course let Satan cheat me out of a ticket for eternal life. That was all that I done. Satan worked on me trough him. I lodt faith then. I see that now. it wasnt until this that I found it again. On Dec. 31, 1999 I hit my knees and asked God what to do. I was nuts over the OM. I had no lcue what to do. I knew in my heart that it was wrong. I had even discussed this with OM.<P>PRAISE GOD HE LED ME TO THIS SITE. I typed in affairs and found this site. I posted for 3 days. everybody of course told me to tell the truth and I done just that. Of ourse it has been a rough ride. Thank God he was there to hold me when I needed him.<P>Your in my prayers Gonnatry! You can do it. pray he puts in on her heart. Regardless, marriage is till death do you part.<P>Prayers<BR>Renee<BR><P>------------------<BR>We can do all things through Christ which strengthens us. Repeat that 5 times a day. I promise you success!

inamess<BR> I too am the betrayer and I too stopped the affair and making my marriage work. The OM I had the affair with was someone I thought I knew for a long time. I knew him before my H. I think the reason it hurt me so much was because I thought he cared for me as a friend and all he wanted was to use me and that hurt most of all. I have known him (i thought) for at least 10yrs. Now the only feelings I have for him is anger. I feel like a sleaze ( dont know how to spell that) and I feel dirty and sometimes I wonder why my H would want to be with me after all of this. But I am sure glad he did, now I couldnt be happier. Thank you for caring.<P>------------------<BR>If you dont have God in your life, you dont have a life at all.