In Plan A, when your S is out on his/her night out, how late do you stay up to wait for her/him to come home, back from the bars/clubs/ etc?<P>just curious<P>thl<BR>

THL<P>Sorry, I can't help. Wife is not living at home. I wish she was so that I could stay up to wait for her!!<P>J W

my husband waited up all night for me to come home. But, it is always up to you individually.<P>meryc

My opinion spouse shouldn't be out to the bars, etc alone unless there's complete agreement (as per MB rules). How late to stay out should be negotiated and then stay up til agreed time. <P>How can trust be established with spouse bar-hopping on their own. Not on my list of recreational activities that would build a good relationship!

HI WhenIfindthetime,<BR> I agree with LooksGood. It's NOT healthy to be in a "Pick-UP" type place without your S. It's downright STUPID!! BECAUSE, there are days that we, ARGUE, FEEL LONELY, FEEL FAT, STUPID, UGLY, BALD,UNNEEDED, UNWANTED TOO OLD, TOO YOUNG, WHATEVER.... <P> Then we're in a Bar without our spouse? Well, that's standing at the edge of the roof!! IMHO, GOOD LUCK AND PRAYERS FRANK

Hi Whenifindthetime,<P>Unfortunatley, my S does have frequent nights out with the guys (I hope) and I have quit waiting up for him. His need for recreational companionship can not always be met by me as our children are involved in many activites and someone needs to be the taxi driver.<P>I go with this....I cannot control what he does outside of our home, I can only control the way I act when he is here. It's my mantra, some day he'll come home and catch me in lotus position chanting this..LOL<P>In our case, waiting up would be a LB as I would sit here getting all upset wondering what he is doing. If I can entertain myself, spend time with kids, ect...I am not as resentful. Plus, he's good about it when I need a night out with my buddies.<P>

OK,<P>I was brought up NOT to stay up because it<BR>breeds insecurity, and my W was brought up to stay up and worry because something bad might happen.<P>However, since my wife is having a MLC of sorts, and goes out with her coworkers of her volunteer job, local town EMT, and she has not gone out much since we had kids, and I have, I am supporting her for what she wants to do.<P>If have asked her and she won't include me because "we are not a couple." I was hoping to let her get it out of her system, and I think she is slowly. <P>So I am stuck in the Plan A quandry, do I suppport it so she finds what she thought she was missing is not that big a deal? or . . .<BR>anytime I have brought it up, she has told me that she would be being held against her will at home with me.<P>Stuck on this one, only once a week on Tuesday nights.<P>Qucik background, beginning of Feb,<BR>W says wants out. March W says wants<BR>D. April, wife says wants separation.<BR>July 8th must move to new house of W employer. W says I can't go right now,<BR>although no legal movement what so ever.<P>Any helpful suggestions?<P>thl