removed<p>[This message has been edited by yuki miaka (edited June 05, 2000).]

Yuki,<P>This is going to be harsh and maybe a little spiteful but know that I do care a great deal for your wellbeing and want to see you heal.<P>How is it that you can ask for help then get resentful to us for giving honest opinions. Then feel like you must get away from us. Does the truth hurt??? Your goddamn right it does... It hurts like ****, but you know what? The only way we can heal is to listen to the truth and accept it.<P>Was it necessary to go through all the BS of having the moderators remove you password and whatever else??? Ya know this really pissed me off for some reason. We listened to all of your stuff, your whinning about no one responding, then all the particulars of your situation, and how you are "different". I for one feel used. We all, each and everyone us reached out, and you are unwilling to listen, then you hit us with all of your bitterness, that is missplaced towards us. Like we were attacking you. <P>Yuki, sooner or later you will have to face the reality that you may not be able to recover your marriage And that it is ok. Or you can choose to be miseable. Face facts you have to make some decsions. We are here as sounding board to help with that, but ultimatly you are accountable for your decisions.<P>I beg you to stay hear and try to learn how to live through this. YOU ARE NO DIFFERENT!!! Until you realise that you won't be able to heal. We do want to help, but when you ask for advice don't chastise us for giving it.<P>I realise you probably can't reply to this however I want you to take this in the way I intend it...TOUGH LOVE...<P>Yuki you can learn to thrive and you don't have to wallow in self pity. So get your [censored] off your pity pot and enjoy our recovery, you can have it to. Life is too short.<P>With Love,<P>Bill<P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

Bravo Bill!!!!!<P>Nuff said!<P>Mitzi

Yuki,<BR>I ventured a guess in a previous post about how you must feel, and you responded favorably. I'm going to venture another guess that if you take the EN questionnaire that your need for attention ranks high on the list. I have a feeling you're going to take one more peek before writing us off to see if anyone responds to your "final" post. <P>The anger and pain in your posts speaks volumes. I am reminded of how I got my most recent scar. A few months ago my dog bit me. He wasn't a bad dog. He was in excruciating pain. I was trying to move him onto a clean cushion and the pain was more than he could withstand. He lashed out at me, and he got me on the arm. I suspect your pain is just as extreme. It tends to make one very defensive. <P>You can find help here if you'll allow it. It won't always be what you want to hear though. Wishing you all the best.

removed<p>[This message has been edited by yuki miaka (edited June 05, 2000).]

removed<p>[This message has been edited by yuki miaka (edited June 05, 2000).]

removed<p>[This message has been edited by yuki miaka (edited June 05, 2000).]

Yuki,<P>Emotional abuse??? From me??? <P>I'm really pissed off...or maybe frustrated...yea that's it...frustrated...<P>Like I said you ask for help and then bellyache about the help you are given...<P>You quoted my whole reply...what is up???<P>We are not try to attack you but trying to reach you...<P>I can feel the desperation in your words...<P>I can feel your pain screaming through...<P>It just isn't going to go away...<P>You have to have hope...<P>Without hope you are doomed to misery...<P>Honestly look at the things that are said to you...<P>If only one person tells you something about yourself...take it with a grain of salt...<P>If several people tell you the same thing...well..you just might want to take a look at it.<P>I beg you to try and not be so deffencive...Take a long hard look at what defects of character you bring to your relationship w/MIL and your H...All you can do is change those things in yourself...<P>You may find that by changing those things you change their opinion of you and thus the nature of your relationships...<P>One last thing...PLEASE DO NOT LEAVE THESE BOARDS!!!<P>With Love,<P>Bill<BR><P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

No, I'm nowhere near experiencing the kind of pain you have. But I used to work in a job where I answered phones all day and answered questions. People would often be very angry, and often they didn't like the answers to their questions. I learned a lot of patience. I also know that sometimes all a person needs in order to feel better is for someone to listen. Often it's not enough, only a beginning.

Hey Yuki,<P>Throw in a lot of physical abuse from your H and your life mirrors mine. But when I came here desperate for help, I was not sarcastic, I was not defensive. I knew that I must have contributed to the break up of my marriage in some way. I opened myself up to strangers and got a lot of good advice that I TOOK! <P>If you would do somewhat the same, you would be a stronger person in no time at all. I am happy and very independent now. Something I hadn't been in 10 years. But because of some of the best people, I am the person that I've wanted to be all my life. <P>Try Plan A and see if it doesn't make you feel the same way.<P>Mitzi

removed<p>[This message has been edited by yuki miaka (edited June 05, 2000).]

Please stop hurting me!!!!! I am not perfect!!!! I make mistakes like everyone else! Are you guys going to keep bashing me over the head like this? I don't wanna argue anymore, please leave me alone until I stop crying.

Yuki,<P>The attack you feel is in your mind...<P>I will admitt to stepping on your toes...<P>Honey you need to find a councelor that you can feel comfortable with...<P>Your fear is eating you up inside...<P>Hang in there...<P>Bill<P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>

Why do you insist? I'm not crazy! I'm tired of people trying to convince me that I am! BTW, I'm not scared of anybody, I'm just tired of "exposing" myself only to let people hurt me over and over again. Take this response however you want. I'm going to ask you again to leave me alone. Isn't it enough that you've hurt my feelings? Now you have to make sure that I suffer dearly for not doing what you said to do. Stop it, all you're doing is hurting me, but obviously it doesn't bother you one bit because you're not me and you don't feel the pain of someone stabbing you repeatedly over something like this. Just leave me alone!!!!!!!!<P>PS I will think about posting later when I feel better, but I can't guarantee that I'll be ready for more attacks.<BR>

{{{{{{{{{{{{{Yuki}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P><BR>Quite honestly, I have no idea what this is about. Mea culpa. I don't read every thread or post and have apparently missed yours, but you need a hug.<P>I don't see Bill as trying to inflame you, but when feelings are so raw--and yes, most of us HAVE felt that--things that wouldn't ordinarily hurt, feel unbearably painful.<P>Can you take a soothing break of some sort? A bath, a walk, a workout, singing, dancing, aromatherapy, anything that you enjoy? Do something nice for you...right now.<P>------------------<BR>Lor<BR>"Let love be genuine...hold fast to what is good; love one another." Rom 12:9-10

wow!

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lor (Lor):<BR><B>{{{{{{{{{{{{{Yuki}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P><BR>Quite honestly, I have no idea what this is about. Mea culpa. I don't read every thread or post and have apparently missed yours, but you need a hug.<P>I don't see Bill as trying to inflame you, but when feelings are so raw--and yes, most of us HAVE felt that--things that wouldn't ordinarily hurt, feel unbearably painful.<P>Can you take a soothing break of some sort? A bath, a walk, a workout, singing, dancing, aromatherapy, anything that you enjoy? Do something nice for you...right now.<P></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P><BR>Thank you so much Lor for not attacking me. I was beginning to wonder if somebody else would continue this.<P>I'm taking a break right now and I'm trying to watch this movie "American Pie" and I'm also listening to my vg music.<P>Thank you so much for you advice and thanks for the hug, I really needed that instead of being kicked again while I'm already down. I hope you can accept my hug too! <BR>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>PS I will think about posting later when I feel better, but I can't guarantee that I'll be ready for more attacks.[/B]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Please do think about it. Especially when you feel you have a more open mind to deal with your situation & people's responses. It might sound callous, but your childish behaviour is becoming more entertaining than anything, to me anyway <P>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by KenB:<BR><B> Please do think about it. Especially when you feel you have a more open mind to deal with your situation & people's responses. It might sound callous, but your childish behaviour is becoming more entertaining than anything, to me anyway <P></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>You called me a brat remember? I have nothing to say to you. Name-calling is unnecessary and is something that kids do. That means your behavior towards me is just as childish.<P>I noticed in your profile that you only had one post at the time. I'm wondering if you didn't sign up just to attack me.<P><p>[This message has been edited by yuki miaka (edited June 05, 2000).]

Hey Yuki,<P>I hope you are feeling better...<P>I have to say, I really was worried about you all afternoon at work today...<P>Have you seen my profile yet? I thought my sit was different...it isn't it is just as sick as any other...but you know what??? I am getting on...<P>Go check my thread on the D&D board...<P>Well I hope you feel better...<P>Bill<P>------------------<BR>BB<BR>