Rosemary my heart goes out to you and your son. Whatever you do, continue coming here for help or just to vent. I have had to grow up in a violent family and believe me, even though I was not the one physically abused I was around it as a child. My mother let her boyfriend beat on her, my sister let her boyfriend beat on her and I can tell you one thing, it left emotional scars on me. I never had a healthy relationship to look up to so of course I have issues in my relationship and have a lot to deal with. For you son's sake, please don't allow this to continue. There will never be ANYTHING that you can do for your husband to help him overcome his violence! REMEMBER THAT! No matter how much you love him, how much you show you love him, it will NEVER BE ENOUGH! He needs Anger Management help and a good therapist. Just going 1 or a couple of times is not enough. He has to actually GET IT! I mean UNDERSTAND that what he is doing is wrong, wrong, wrong. As far as the affair and lies, was he like this before you married? Did you have any warning signs that this is what life would be like if you married him. Not that it makes a difference now, but you do need to look at why you put yourself into something that you know is not healthy. I am in no way saying that you are at fault for his behavior, but usually women that stay with abusive men, have been beaten down by a low self-esteem and need to regain their inner strength. Work on yourself and take care of your child. If husband gets help, GREAT, but that can't be your concern anymore, your concern now is YOU and your son. Keep posting here, it does help.
