Hello Gang,<P>I've noticed that people hold marriage in the lowest esteem. I get this impression from humour, t.v., movies and talking to other people.<P>I'm looking for opinions on why our society veiw marriage in this light. And what can be done to reverse this negative view.<P>I'm going to use this topic at our marriage meeting at church in mid-July. Any opinions expressed would be helpful.<P>Thanxx in advance.<P>------------------<BR>PSALMS 133<BR>AMOS 7:7-8<BR>ECCLESIASTES 12:1-7

Can't change things overnight, but you can make a difference in one person at a time, starting with your family. We can rear our children to respect marriage by the examples we set in our own and by the things that come out of our mouths. Yes, I know society bombards us with negative images, but consider prejudice. If parents didn't provide strong role models at home, there would be whole groups of society that felt like outcasts, so I do think the family environment is a strong learning place. I think it is stronger than the media, peers, and anything else. Recall the days when shame was used to control promiscuity? That was family and societal pressure. <P>Another thing we can do is something beautiful I just saw at a wedding yesterday. The priest had the couple make their vows to each other and God, then he asked the people attending the wedding to promise to support the union in all ways, in happy times and bad. I think that is wonderful! I made that promise and take it seriously. If society were made part of the deal, they have a responsibility and commitment to nurture marriage just like the couple does. I think it would extend to all marriages, not just those we attend.<P>Maybe it's a pie in the sky fantasy, but it worked for me.

Hi Salem,<P>I was visiting with some freinds the other night, and this topic came up. They know all about my situation, my husbands infidelity, and our seperation. They have been married 34 years. They made a statement that at least I had 15 good years of marriage (out of 19). Is that all we can expect anymore? Is 15 years, and then a divorce a success story in this day and age? <P>People congratulate couples in long-term marriages. How many are amazed at the ones that make it over 20 years. I have had countless people smile and say, "Wow, 19 years, how did you do it?" <P>As a society, our expectations of long-term marriages are so low. We should expect marriages to last, not be surprised when it happens. I guess, due to the times we live in it's just a sad fact...I mean, how many of my kids freinds are from broken homes...at least 50%.<P>I wish I knew the answers. I do think there should be some kind of mandated marriage work that couples should have to do. I don't want the Gov't any more involved in our lives than they are, but we need help. We don't know how to do this. Even the people I know that claim to be Christians are messing up big time. <P>Let us know if you find any answers within the group you'll be sharing with. Lord knows we could use it.<P>allison<BR>