Hi everyone. I found out a while ago that my husband was having an "e-mail affair" with an old friend. He admitted that it was a bad idea, and we have been working things out since then. However, just today I learned that on at least one occasion he took off from work to meet her in another state for the day. How concerned should I be that he never gave me all the details when I first found out about the affair? I don't know what to think..... Please help!

Hi, I'm sorry you are here, but glad that you found us.<P>I think that most men prefer not to go into details about inappropriate relationships. He probably thinks he is "sparing your feelings" by not giving you all of the details.<P>You might want to make it very clear to him that since you are both working on your marriage, it is very important that you know all that occurred, so that there is no chance of this kind of "discovery" setting you back in your recovery together. Let him know that you will not be any more angry - and stick to that. REWARD him for honesty, don't punish him...<P>Hope this helps!<BR><P>------------------<BR>terri<BR>I can see clearly now,<BR>the rain is gone ...

Hi, I want you to know that I have gone through this too. My husband said he had kissed a girl at his work and it was only a kiss. I sinced there was more. This went on for 6 months till it burned me up inside thinking he did more and was lying to me. Something inside me felt like doing something wrong myself. I wound up cheating on him. I slept with someone, and couldn't stand the quilt and broke down and told him everything. I regret it so much! He did tell me after I told him I cheated on him that he did more than kiss her. I knew he did! You can always go with your gut feeling. What I want to tell you is if he is truly sorry and you feel he is trying to make things right between you two. Let whatever he did in his past be. It will only hurt you and drive you crazy thinking there could be more. If you could forgive him if he slept with someone , then forgive him whether he did or not. Don't do what I did. It's not worth it! I just told him last week and we are going through a really hard time! We both know God and I know we will make it! Hope I could help?