Okay, so I had a BAAAADDDD weekend. Lots of tension between H and I. Saturday - he was upset about the people I go out with. Sunday - I was upset because he failed to tell me the "truth" about him and the OW going out that night to what has been a family event for the past few years. A good thing, though, we talked a lot about both situations and seemed to come to an understanding. Something we had a very difficult time doing before the A.<P>Now today. I spoke with H this AM. Thanked him for listening to me the last couple of days. Told him I thought there was a lot of tension between us the past few days. But I was glad we were actually able to get through it. Said I wanted our times together to be good ones. It makes me sad when we don't get along. He listened and added some comforting words. Asked him about last night. He said it wasn't so good (yeah!!!). Told him he sounded sad. He said things weren't going so well. I asked was it me? He said no. I asked, "Is it there?" Meaning the OW. He said "yes". I told him he didn't need to say anymore. I wasn't going to ask anymore. Then he offered the following: She is upset because he won't bring our D around (boy, does she have the nerve!). He told her what my wishes were and that is why she cannot see our D. She told him she didn't think she was ever going to see her. So I listened. Told him thank you for thinking of my feelings on this one. I appreciate it so much. Told him if he needed someone to talk to about it I was here. We talked a little bit more. <P>Talked to him again after work. Found out her work schedule this week and that she is going out of town on Saturday - without him! WooHoo!!! So, I'll get to spend time with him again. We're going to a concert tomorrow (she thinks he's watching out D so I can work). Wednesday, he'll be with her. Thursday, he's watching our D so I can go out with a friend. Friday night she's working so I'm gonna try for a dinner date. Saturday, she's out of town. Hopefully, we'll go hit the driving range. Sunday, she's still out of town so who knows what will happen then. <P>So, things are looking up again. Even after a bad couple of days I think we came out of this one pretty good. I'm happy with it and H is still wanting to talk to me. I also see that it is now more important then ever that I do not LB. The OW is doing the LBing and H is already looking for a safer place. That needs to be with me. I pray he is starting to see that.<P>Thanks for listening!<P><BR><P>------------------<BR>Molli<P>Find your strength within!

Molliiiiiiii,<P>You did good! Your communication skills as a couple sounds like it's really improving. Amazing isn't it...all that communication and honesty entails.<P>I nominate you as the poster child for hanging tough while H is still living with OW. There is no tougher situation I can imagine. You look at the positive in every small battle you win, and that will help you win this war.<P>Yeah, let her LB all she wants. OW will help you get him home, whether she knows it or not.<P>Way to go!<P>allison<BR>

Allison - <P>You are tooooooo good for words! Thank you so much for the confidence booster. I really needed that. I will continue to keep smiling and let her take care of the LBs. <P>Wish me luck for tonight. It's the concert. I guess you could call this date #2.<P>Thanks, again!!!!<P><P>------------------<BR>Molli<P>Find your strength within!

I'm really glad I didn't know for sure about the OW during the affair. I've got to give you credit for your strength! Keep adding to your love bank, sounds like it's working. While H and I were separated I always sent him little cards, left voice mails just to say good night and I love you. Especially towards the end he would always thank me for the voice mail saying "It's so nice to hear something happy" He knew he had a loving wife at home and by then the OW was LBing big time! Eventually most OW will start to put the pressure on about divorce, being with MMs kids etc. And you'll be there with open arms!

FD - <P>Yep, it's already happening. OW is pressuring him to divorce me and she also wants to spend time with our D (Not going to happen!). H has been telling her he just hasn't gotten around to the divorce (whatever! Yeah, that would be the case since he doesn't have much free time. If he's not with her he's with me). And as far as our D, well, he is respecting my wishes and I love him all the more for it. So I do give him cards and little things (cookies, flowers, etc) and lots of thank yous for the things he does for me and our D. I know it's working because he keeps spending more and more time with me. <P>Thanks for the reply FD!<P><P>------------------<BR>Molli<P>Find your strength within!