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Joined: Aug 2000
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Well, my son mentioned the other guy again and I sort of lost it. We were watching TV together & she got up went outside to talk on the phone, so stupid me, I got caught evesdropping. We then went into another room and I told her about my fears. She said the OM is just a friend & there's nothing there. I told her I believer her & since I have no hard evidence to the contrary, I guess I do. Anyhow, we're all taking off to the beach for the weekend, I need some ideas on how I can make up for my really stupind andd insensitive behavior. Any suggestions?<P>Thanks,<BR>Nick
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Joined: Jul 2000
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Nick,<BR> When someone gets up, leaves the room to take a phonecall from someone else, it's only natural to be curious as to why she left. Now it could have been as simple as your tv was too loud for her to hear the phone, or something else. I do believe that there can be friendships with other sex persons, that have nothing to do with sex. Just apologize, and don't try to read so much into her actions. Don't act like you don't trust her, by eavesdropping, etc. You said yourself, you have no hard evidence of an affair, so quit acting like there is something to look for. Trust your wife, until she gives you a true reason not to. Not easy, I know, but you may end up pushing her in the wrong direction by communicating over and over that you don't trust her. Good luck.
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Joined: Aug 2000
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Thanks ktgirl,<BR>A girls opinion on this really helps. I have to believe she is basically the same wonderful person I married, albeit no longer "in love with me". I guess my real fear is not so much a PA as an EA, which will make it much more diffficult for me to win her back, when she's getting some or most of her EN's met somewhere else. I asked her to try give me a chance to meet her EN's as well as allow me to participate in her favorite activities and she said ok, so I'm hopeful that if she starts letting me share activities with her again, I can do a better job of meeting her EN's<P>Nick
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Joined: Jul 2000
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Nick,<BR> No problem. Happy to help. I will say that it really helped my H and I when we took the EN's questionaire and showed it to each other. We had a long talk, question by question, and explained our answers to each other. It has done wonders!!!! We are both communicating better than we ever have before. I hope your wife will agree to do this with you. Good luck, okay, and keep us posted!
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