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PANIC!
#888594 10/02/00 10:52 AM
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 101
Michigan
M
Mourning
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Mourning
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M Offline
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 101
Michigan
We have an appointment today at 2:00 with the marriage counselor. I'm so nervous I can hardly breathe. I am staying in my office, trying to avoid people seeing me this way. I can't concentrate. I don't know what I'll say when we go. I am so afraid to say anything that will make him mad. I know he won't go nuts in front of the counselor (will he?) but I'm afraid about later. If I say the wrong thing now, I may have to pay later.<BR> I hope this guy allows smoking in his office! That will help me out. Wish us luck!
Re: PANIC!
#888595 10/02/00 11:06 AM
Joined: Aug 2000
Posts: 716
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weep Offline
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weep
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Posts: 716
Dear Mourning,<P>Your counsellor is a trained professional and would be able to prompt and probe in a manner that is acceptable to both parties. Furthermore, you are there to get answers and share your needs and issues within the marriage that are critical, so you need to be honest. What usually helps is a diplomatic tone and the correct mindset in wanting to better the relationship with your spouse and make objective clear at the start for your H to hear.<P>God bless you<BR>weep
Re: PANIC!
#888596 10/02/00 11:27 AM
Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 56
McPherson, Kansas
R
rockaway Offline
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rockaway
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Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 56
McPherson, Kansas
Mourning,<P>Good morning! Having been to several marriage counselors I can say with near certainty that the counselor will create a non-threatening atmosphere and help you feel a little more at ease, which will help you communicate better.<BR>As for what you say, try not to attack your husband verbally in front of the couselor; (You always get angry and violent.) rather use "I feel" statements like, "When (husband) breaks things in our home, I feel frightened and feel that he might physically attack me. Then I feel like running away."<BR>I hope this helps.<BR>I just hope you have a safe place to go to for safety if you need to escape for awhile. If buying you a carton of cigs would help, I'd do it [Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]<BR>Rockaway<p>[This message has been edited by rockaway (edited October 02, 2000).]
Re: PANIC!
#888597 10/03/00 12:16 AM
Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 2,997
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TruthSeeker Offline
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TruthSeeker
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Joined: Feb 2000
Posts: 2,997
I agree with what has already been said. Be honest in a non-threatening way. And if you don't feel safe going home with him, go someplace where you do feel safe.<P>My thoughts and prayers are with you. Good luck.

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