I have recently (last several months) found out how important my independence is as far as my husband is concerned (mine, that is). It seems as if when I try to get him to open up to me or I'm too concerned about what's going on in his life, that he doesn't like it. He sees it as clingy, needy and not attractive. I know that I could not turn off these feelings and just act "as if", but finally something did snap in me. I started not basing my whole happiness upon him and have been a much happier person lately. I love him (I've really tried to convince myself otherwise because of my hurt from his actions) but I guess I have to realize that my life is not totally revolved around him. I started learning to love who I am and knowing that I can have outside activities (sports, etc.) that don't include him, and still have fun.<P>When I finally learned to actually like being more independent from him, he started coming back it seemed, little by little. More interested in what I'm doing, my whereabouts, etc. I've taken an active interest in health related issues and working out, he seems to really be supportive of this, even wants to join me at the gym now. <P>I know that independence is attractive, but I have finally learned to be happy being independent, and it seems that my husband is drawn to this. Anyone else have the same experience?