Hey y'all, I need some help. I have completely lost faith in everything. I have no faith my wife will come back to me, I have no faith that any plan will work, with only one committed member. I have no faith in ME, that IF my wife came back now, I could ever trust her again anyway. The only light I see, is that i can walk away from all of this.<P>I know that will not be an easy road either. Can anybody here that HAS been divorced, tell me what they feel about it NOW. By NOW, I mean, would you have done it differently if you had KNOWN of the MB concepts back then? Would it have made a difference. I know if I divorce my wife, there are good odds I will never see or talk to her again. That is sad, because she wasn't just my wife she was my best friend and companion.<P>To those that have, do you wish you hadn't divorced? We have no children to get caught up in the mess, just us. We don't have any family here either, so there won't be any of that to face either. I HATE divorce, but I can't see any reason to keep fighting and beating myself up emotionally. I am still young enough to where I can start over and still have the family I hope to have.<P>Does it make sense that I am afraid if we got back together now, I would be miserable forever, worrying about this happening again? I always dreamed of us having children, but now I am afraid. What if something like this happened after we had children. I guess my feelings of my wife's moral character are bent now. Do they ever get REALLY straightened back out???<P>How do you people go years apart? What keeps you hoping and holding on? How do you curb the hurt? How do you control the raging hormones? How do you keep your eyes off the single women that make it known that they are interseted in YOU????<P>Aaaaaaarrrggggghhhhh!!!!!!!! I think the part that bothers me is I do not feel the emotional pain anymore. I sleep good again. I eat fine now. I am just sick of waiting while my wife talks to OM everyday, and we don't talk at all anymore. I am ready for SOMETHING, just not sure what.<P>Thanks for letting me vent....<P>Joel (SS4N)

Joel,<P>You need to ask this question in the Divorced and divorcing part of the forum. I think you will get some very interesting answers.<P>I'll talk with you later.<P>God Bless,<P>JL

I guess I could post it over there, but I know several of the posters HERE have been married more than once. I was soliciting their opinions. How do you do the link thing that I see some of you old timers do everynow and then???<P>Thanks,<P>Joel (SS4N)<BR>

Joel,<P>I just copy the web address at the top of your browser and put in between the following set of commands:<P> "web address goes here.<P>This will produce a bookmark, that someone can click on and send them to wherever you want.<P>Now this should not be tried with your W. No fair sending her someplace. <P>Joel, I have never been divorced and never involved in an affair from either side. But my advice is if you feel it is gone and you feel you have done all you can do. Then there isn't much left to regret. Go in peace from your marriage knowing you have done all you can do.<P>Until then, do your best. This is marriage builders, and I am very strongly in favor of doing whatever you can to save a marriage. But even Harley knows not every situation can be saved. You have to make that determination. I sure wish I could be of help in getting you and LIL back together, but sadly we just get to watch here.<P>And it isn't pretty from here and is downright ugly from where you sit. I truely believe she is blowing it, and I truely believe you cannot save her from herself. You can only work on yourself.<P>So hang in there as long as you can, but you will know when it is time. The love will be gone.<P>God Bless You Joel and God Bless LIL,<P>JL