My wife (WS) still denies the affair, but I have overwhelming evidence that it continues. She moved out two months ago (d-day was in July) claiming existing problems with our marriage was the cause. OM also moved out from his family, but they don't live together. She pursued legal separation papers (just in case) which included 50/50 custody of our 12 year old son and was very generous with splitting up our property (gave me 70% equity in our house). I've been Plan A-ing with no serious LB-s, and once in a while there's hints of its effectiveness. Yesterday, in a phone conversation, she again claimed we're "just friends," strongly insinuating that whatever it was between them, it was over, saying "things change." (She wouldn't give me a definitive yes or no.) I asked, "If it's over, will you go to counseling?" She sort of agreed, but said it's too soon - she needs more time to "heal" first. Then she asks if I've signed the separation papers yet - "that's the first step." Of course, she's zooming me. Why would the separation papers be relevant to counseling? My bet is that, although she won't admit the affair, she knows I have the goods on her to win full custody of our son based on infidelity and that's why she wants the papers signed - to lock in the 50/50 custody. The healing and counseling stuff was a decoy. Here's the tough question: I really don't want to get into a custody battle - she'll fight like a caged tiger - and I really don't want to put my son through that, but could the threat of her losing half custody be an effective calculated LB to lift the fog? Or is it too risky, so I sign the papers, avoid a custody battle, keep doing Plan A, and wait for a natural death (PTC) including Plan B if necessary? Don't worry, I'll run this by my attorney.<P>WAT
