Is anyone elses H or W in the fog and not just from the A? My H is a workaholic...no substance abuse just works a lot. He seems to get a "high" from being at work. Can't be away from it...no vacations, nothing. It appears to be the single most important thing in his life.

My advice is to start Plan A, buy some books that are recommended, and learn to tell him (if you don't already) in a very sincere way, that one of your needs is more time (and/or affection). Get him to read some of the stories from people on here that did not so something soon enough when there were problems like yours, so he can see the results.

Thanks Rick37, My H has already had an EA with someone at work...said that she cared to listen to him. It's hard when he finds his meaning in life at work and then found someone he worked close with to be that support. He just took a job far away and will have his own apartment there, visiting once in awhile...he says it is short term like 4 or 5 months. But I know him and his work. I have just gone through a year of hell and we decided 2 weeks ago to move on...and then he drops this on me. I was not asked to go his plan is to make work the priority and then he can visit me when time allows...he won't read books, Lord knows I have tried and have bought them all, we did the counseling thing, and then he was against it. I would drop everything for him if he needed me, but I feel like I am being used. He hasn't asked me to wait for him but you know we had a nice weekend hanging out...we haven't had one of those in over a year and now he leaves friday.

Yes, My wife is in love with her job more that anything else right now but I can relate. I used to be the same way with my company before I sold it. For me it was an identity thing to be the successful young business owner. I'm still trying to figure out what she is getting out of it in hopes of providing that feeling at home. Could also be a safety thing. He might find work a place that is sort of normal compared to the rest of his life. Work is also a place that you have a little more control over "things".<P><BR>