My H is now telling me he doesn't want to go thru with the Divorce...but I'm beginning to wonder if this is to avoid the financial consquences that will come out of a divorce...<BR>Money is a big issue regarding our reconsilitaion ..or at least it is for me...<BR>Does he want to work on our marriage because he wants rebuild our relationship or is it because of the length of our marriage he will have a financial responsibility that will take him the rest of his lifetime to pay off....?<P>Something with the IRS just came up and I am sooo leary how he is going to respond...<BR>Should I offer to pay half the bill...even though I am not getting support from him and am only drawing disability social security..in good faith to show him it is not about the money...<P>If we were together we would handle this together..Cut back or whatever to get thru this ,but we're not so I'm not sure how to take care of this....<P>Please any suggestion or ideas...I know in the past I have been advised that since he wanted this seperation I should let him take responsibility for all the consquences...money or whatever comes...but in trying to do a plan A...I know he will see it as a HUGE LB.......<BR>Help please...what options do I have that I can't see or think of...?<BR>Tyra

Tyra,<P>I don't understand - the non-custodial parent is usually so much better off financially after divorce. My H is required to pay in child support 25% less of his gross income than he used to contribute to the family. The state makes sure that he has enough to live on before requiring him to pay a percentage of the rest - and it makes no difference whether he has 1 child or 20. <P>My H lives pretty well on very little money, since he shares expenses with an OW who has plenty of money. He told me shortly after he left that he couldn't separate his feelings about our financial situation from his feelings about me. Reducing his financial obligations to his family is a strong motivating factor for divorce.