Hello All...<BR>I hope that you all had a good Thanksgiving!<BR>It's been 2 years now since "D" day. In 1998, we were separated and H spent his Thanksgiving with the OW. We've come a long way since then. This Thanksgiving we spent it together and I think that it has to be the best Thanksgiving we have ever had!!!<P>We put up our X-mas tree and made a big dinner and had my parents over. It was wonderful. We all went around and said what we were thankful for and when it came to my H's turn {being the simple and somewhat shy type as he is} he said that he was thankful for everyone at this table! <P>I started a new job a couple of weeks ago and to my surprise my H did a couple of wonderful things for me. I came home one day from work and he had cleaned the entire house for me, and then the next night he had surprised me and cooked supper for me. <P>Last night, my daughter came to me and I could tell she was a little upset and had something on her mind. She asked me if "we" got a divorce what would happen to her and who would she live with? I am not sure why she had this on her mind as things have been wonderful between her father and me but she did. <P>My H and I both were sitting there and he asked her why she thought that we would be getting a divorce? She didn't know but he reassured her that we were not getting a divorce!<P>Well, this got me to thinking about what life could be like if we had not gotten back together and worked on our marriage. I got to thinking about how our children would have been going here and there, splitting their holiday up between both of their parents and so on and so forth.<P>I asked my H if he ever thought of things in that way? And if there were ever times that he would see something and get to thinking about what things could have been like and be happy that things turned out the way they are? He said that he did!<P>I also talked to a friend yesterday who is going through a lot of problems in her relationship. She wanted to know what I did to change things for us and how she could do it too.<P>I really had no good answers for her. It's not like a receipe I told her. But she insisted that I must have done something because of the way my H has changed and the way he does things for me and us now.<P>All I could tell her is that I had gone through much of what she is now and that it took 14 yrs. for us to get to this point in our relationship and alot of pain and hurt went right along with it.<P>Funny how the view of others and the comments that they have can help us to see what is right in front of our face all along. My H and I now have the type of relationship that I have always wanted it and knew it could be. And for that I am so VERY THANKFUL!!!!<P>So for those of you out there who are still going through this hell.... I have this to say. I don't think that we would be where we are today if we hadn't gone through hell first. As a matter of fact, I know we wouldn't be.<P>As hard as it was for me to go through this A with him, as hard as it was for me to take the abuse {both verbal and emotional} I can say this with a honest and humble heart....<P>WE ARE BETTER OFF FOR HAVING DONE IT!!!!<P>As I told my friend who knows all the details of my H's affair and our 6 month separation, I can't predict the future and I don't know what the future will bring but I will not let the past dominate our present and I will not let it dictate our future. All I want to do is enjoy the blessings I have right her and right now!!!!<P>I always wanted to believe that my H and I would get to this point when the affair was in action but inside I didn't think it would. I hope that my story brings a little hope, faith and strength to you this season, as I know first hand how hard it is to go through the holidays with this kind of situation hanging over your head.<P>God Bless,<BR>Genie

Hi Genie29,<BR>Thanks for posting this. It made me smile. It's great to read posts from someone who is going to the right direction, who has succeeded.<P>I can tell you think positively, and I guess that's one of the strong point of you..<P>I hope your post give lots of hopes and courage to other people here..<BR>Again, thanks and wish you and your family well .<P>Meg <BR>

Genie,<P>It was wonderful to read your post. You have given me & others hope, that you can turn things aroung. Prayers going for you & your family that things will only get better & your D will no longer worry that her parents might be thinking of divorce. God Bless.

Genie,<P>I'm so happy to see what you've written here.<BR>You provide so much hope to others when you write like this. <P>What a contrast to those posts of two years ago. It just stinks that you had to go through an affair to get to a better place but, that's just the reality. Now keep up the good work. I am always thinking of you.<P>V

Genie29 -<P>Thank you so much for sharing your story. You have given people here a lot of hope. I am glad that you had a wonderful Thanksgiving - and may you have many, many more!