We are into our fifth month of recovery. The holidays are hard for me, my son just left for the Marines. I feel so alone, all of our family are non-existant, our friends (what few we had) have headed for the hills. I have no one to talk to. I try to talk to my H I know this brings up guilt, although I don't talk about the A. Just about life, he wants me to be happy yappy yappy all of the time, he told me tonight that I talk enough for three people. I wear my heart on my sleeve and get so hurt. It seems that whenever I need his support he pulls away from me. This only brings full force the A. I think he should at least listen to me when I need to talk. I don't LB am very careful to make sure he knows how much I love him. I just get down and lonely sometimes. He tells me that he is doing the best he can. He doesn't want me to have friends, or anyone in my lif that might offer me an outlet. I have told him that for me conversation is a big EN and that I don't want anyone else to fill it, but I am tempted to find someone who will just talk with me. He is very insecure even though I constantly reassure him. He is jealous because I miss my son, he is jealous of my dogs, my work, everything. He pulls away and makes snide comments. He has buried us in debt, to tie us to each other. I just don't know how much more I can take. Thanks just needed to vent... Jenni