I'm just wondering, from any of you out there that have gone throught this, how long it took after the WS received the Plan B letter that a response was received by you? Has anybody ever had a WS that was so moved by the letter that she or he was immediately shaken from the fog by it?<P>My Plan B letter will be going out soon. Within the next month or so, as soon as she moves out. I have been working closely with Steve Harley and he seems to believe that this would be the appropiate time. I have been doing the best Plan A possible to show her my changes and let her know she has a safe environment to come back to. Unfortunately, she still sees this OP on a regular basis with no regards to my feelings, and Steve is concerned as to the damage that is being done.<P>I've got to admit I am very apprehensive about Plan B. I guess most of us are. I'm just looking for some responses here to know what results the Plan B letter has given for others.

well, I never did a plan B letter since he plan Bed me and stoped all contact when he moved out.<P>But after 4 months of absolutly no contact, he seems to be making a bit of a move... talked to me and said he was trying to end it with her. So be prepared for a long wait. I know some people have had faster results, but it could be a long time too. <BR>Lora

Hi AH,<P>Count me in among those that were too chicken to send a Plan B letter. I was a pretty good Plan A'er, but suck at B. Conversation is a huge need for both me and my H, and he knows how to suck me into two hour chats whenever he feels like one...I turn to moosh and enjoy talking to him even when the subject matter is hurtful. I always feel better after our talks. I do wish I was better at B, because when I was doing it well it was driving him pretty nutso.<P>If you send one, the thing is, you really need to stick with it...and I knew I could not do it. The fact that I have three teens living with me is another reason Plan B would be really difficult for me.<P>You know, those here who really stick with the Harleys advice seem to do really well...regardless of the outcome of their marriages. If you're counseling with them, do what they suggest...they are onto something here.<P>Scary stuff, I know.<P>allison

Allison,<P>I know what you mean. My wife is my best friend. The thought of not being able to communicate with her for a great length of time really scares me. Maybe that's a good thing because my wife, even with the fog and all, still communicates with me quite frequently. Hopefully, it works both ways...