I am new to post here. I've spent the best part of 2 days reading your posts and respondents to you about your revelation to your W. <P>There are several things I want to say,but am short on time, now. Will come back again to address them.<P>I admire your courage and determination to do the right thing in telling your W. I also admire your endurance at returning to address post after post that confronted your plans and motivations for revelation.<P>I have been where you said you didn't want to be. I ended an EA in 6/99. I heard of Harley's concepts at church in the midst of the 3 month affair. It got me thinking and then reading. I found my way to websites and messageboards in 9/99. The guilt, the shame and the desire to make it right and to make my marriage what it never had been have kept me searching and working toward that goal.<P>To date, my wife is still unaware of the A. It was essentially an internet relationship with someone that I had known long before I met my W and with whom contact escalated once we both got PCs. We had once been in love as young adults, then she broke it off, supposedly for religious differences that were irreconcilable.<P>I only have time to say that I have gained a lot of courage myself from reading of your experiences and plans. I have searched many places for a place to discuss my feelings and thoughts but never found one. I must say that I've never seen so many posts to one message before. I think you are well-cared for, Ivory. And I think your friends are incredibly supportive and straight with you.<BR>I'm sure you realize this, already.<P>My purpose for writing is to say thank you for all sharing so that I can see that maybe there IS some way to disclose my secret and hope for my marriage to then begin to grow. I realize that I'm not giving much info about myself/situation right now, but will have to do at a later time. Just really wanted to say how encouraged I am by what I've read here. My prayers and wishes for your wife and you,<P>StephenB
