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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 827
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 827 |
When my W tells me something that is not too positive, but that is not my responsibility, I nearly always respond with "I'm sorry". This is not really a good response, and my W doesn't always care to hear this. Does anyone have another response??<P>Thanks,<P>Bill
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Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 1,063
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Joined: Nov 1999
Posts: 1,063 |
"Really?" "Wow!" "How do/did you feel about that?" Must have been tough/hard for you", "how can I support you through this"?
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Joined: Dec 2000
Posts: 827
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Joined: Dec 2000
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Thanks Sue!<P>I'll try some of these.<P>Bill
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060 |
Bill - women want their feelings validated. Try responding some way that conveys empathy a bit deeper than "I'm sorry," like "that must have been a big disappointment" or "I can't imagine how much that bothered you."<P>Of course, I'm a guy so what do I know? I learned the hard way, don't try to solve all their problems. We are hardwired to fix things. They don't want that. They want whomever they're talking to to join them in their feelings.<P>WAT
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Ditto on what <B>worthatry</B> said. I know if my husband kept saying "I'm sorry" ALL the time, I would think he didn't care because it starts to sound like an automated response.....the kind you get when you call your bank.<P>I'm not trying to be mean, but saying the same thing over and over again sounds like you don't care to acknowledge your wife's feelings.<P>My two cents,<BR>Miaka
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