Hi everyone. My H seems to be out of the fog and I thought I would be happy if this ever happened, but I have drifted into major emotional withdrawal and have no desire to move forward or to decide to leave. I feel NOTHING!! What do I do? My H took me on a date to the most beautiful restaurant and has now sent me this note:<P>"This is very awkward given our recent lives, but I want to wish you a Happy<BR>Valentines Day! Whatever happens with us I will always love you. There is<BR>no way I could ever discount what you have meant to my life. I, perhaps<BR>foolishly so, am optimistic about our future and hope that you can be there<BR>one day also! On Monday in counseling you said that one day you are going<BR>to make someone a great wife... I think you are right. Maybe that someone<BR>will be me! I hope that this note makes you smile."<P>What do you think about this and any suggestions on how to start feeling again?

I know that the road ahead looms like a great mountain you have yet to climb. Try to open yourself up to your H, and let him show you how he is changing. Work through the "his needs her needs" book with him. Do this kind of thing together, and see if working on the same task, on each other helps to relight your interest in your marriage. Be patient, and ask him to be also. Continue to be honest with him and you will feel more at ease.<P>Have you read the SAA book yet? It is helpful to understand and get past resentment of the WS after he returns. There are other books too, that may help. I will try to find out what they are, they are not right here by my computer!