I decided to change my office around today since I associate it with all of the pain I have been going thru. Its hard even though my H was only here once I feel like I am letting go of something. I can only imagine what it will be like when he moves his stuff out of the house. People are telling me it looks like it is over, I do not know when or if I will get the papers but H was planning tto start them this week. Sometimes I fell like I am losing it and the anti depressants are not kicking in fast enough. I grieve for my old H and know he is not that way anymore. I am just hanging on by prayers now...

It ain't over till it's over! People kept telling me that too. Move on with your life, he's not coming back... I went to a therapist who only wanted to "prepare me for the eventual end of my marriage". I'm so glad I didn't listen to any of them. If you don't want a divorce then contest it! Stall for time. Time can be your best friend in these situations. It was for me. If H had filed I would have fought it big time. Buy yourself as much time as possible.<P>My sister's h left her for an OW. she granted him a speedy dissolution since they had no kids and he was ABSOLUTELY SURE he wanted out. 2 months after the divorce he was begging her to take him back, he'd made a horrible mistake etc. Turned out the OW wasn't all he thought she was. Imagine that. She is a very strong person and said no way. He begged for the next 2 years until she finally moved aways and changed her number so he can't find her.<P>Dont' give up until you are ready.

Thank you fairydust!!!<BR>My counselor does not want me to go thru the healing process yet either. She has been a great counselor and has been guiding me thru this step by step. Also, everyone on MB has been helping. All I can do is continue on , I have been doing a Plan A/Plan B since November and this last week started the full plan B. Its nice to talk to people who are or have gone thru the same thing and see their results.