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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 113
Member
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Member
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 113 |
Well I stayed with me wife last night. She acted like everything was going to be ok. Tonight however she wanted to be by herself. I'm really starting to hate this roller coaster. The hardest part is just keeping it together. Oh well I guess I'll just keep it up with plan A. I mean if she fell in love with me once then she will again right? I just gotta figure out which EN's I quit satisfiying. I wonder if she talked to the OM tonight and that is why she wanted me to stay away. Well I just hope for the best.
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 10
Junior Member
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Junior Member
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 10 |
I just posted a message and read yours. I too am going through the emotional roller coaster. <P>How to handle it? Read books, bible and keep busy. The more you can stay level the better. This is my assumption, only because I seem to be a better person and am happier when doing these three. My wife also seems to take more notice. <P>She says the one thing she hates the most is when I nag and sulk. You see I'm in the same situation as you. It's ironic how the victim is beat up even more after being slammed to the ground from the news of an affair. Why is it that the person committing the sin never feels guilty or sinful. My wife has never said this to me and I don't understand why she feels it was justified because I failed to meet her needs.<P>Anyways, good luck and I'm anxious to follow your story too.<P>
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Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 113
Member
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Member
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 113 |
that was wierd I was replying to your post when you were replying to mine. well good luck to you and let me know how it works out. I'll keep you posted on my problem as well.
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060
Member
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Member
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 10,060 |
Guys - hang in there and give them space. The roller coaster is a fact of the disease and all you can do is hold on tight. Work on yourself in identifying your contributions to the environment that allowed the A to occur. Demonstrate the improvements, don't try to tell her about them. Actions speak louder than words here. Whatever you do, resist the temptation to criticize or direct your anger at them. If you feel yourself wanting to respond in attack mode or with sarcasm, count to ten first. Hopefully you'll zip your lip. Believe me, I've had too many occasions when I said something and wish I hadn't a split second later. Good luck.<P>WAT
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