Fairydust,<P>You said your H came back, How long was he gone for? Did he act like you never existed?<P>The reason for my question is my H has been gone for 4 months now and has never even checked on me during this whole time. Yes, I have Plan A'd. Now H has filed, it seems as if I never existed and won't. Just need your input. Thanks!

<BR>[B]Fairydust,<P>You said your H came back, How long was he gone for? Did he act like you never existed?>><P>Here's my basic story:<BR>Well he was gone for 5 months. The first 6 weeks he was very cold and mean to me. He did call to check on me ocasionally BUT I was pregnant at the time. We had been trying for a baby and I'd had a miscarriage, which kind of freaked him out and I think contributed to the depression which lead to the A. When he told me he was leaving he said "Let's just hope you're not pregnant." I took a test the next day but he didn't know for 3 days because he disappeared. Listen to this fog! When I told him, he was mad (we HAD been trying for a baby, it was no accident), then he asked me to get an abortion, when I said No he said "Well then, I'll pay support but you can raise the baby on your own." I never could have imagined him having an attitude like that and saying those things! So he would call and check on me about once a week (but he wasn't nice and it was only out of a sense of obligation). He told me it couldn't be construed as him abandoning his family because he didn't know for sure that I was pregnant until AFTER he left (even though he knew it was a distinct possibility). I told him I still loved him, the door was still open but I wouldn't push him to do anything. One night he came over to pick up some things (still being a [censored]). I was crying, but not really saying much. Then he said (out of the blue) I just need more time, I'm confused. I asked him for a hug before he left. He hugged me and held on for a long time. The next day he called me and told me he missed me etc. and things progressed from there. We still had ups and downs, back and forth, but when the basic change came in him it came pretty abruptly. He is a great Daddy to our little boy (and our new baby!) and I'm sure the fact that he said he didn't want him will be his cross to bear for the rest of his life. I still wouldn't give up hope if you aren't ready. My sister's H begged to come back 2 months after they were divorced (and he had been REALLY mean to her) She didn't want him by then though.<P>

Fairydust,<P>I am sorry he was mean to you during a critical time. My h and I were also trying to have children before he left me. I pray that my H will come back before the paperwork is signed but I have had no clue from him. All I know is he had a hard time last Saturday packing things up according to his aunt but that is all. He has made no attempt to talk to me at all and this hurts tons!! Thanks for listening. Congrats on your little boy!!