Hi all,<BR>I haven't been here for a while.. and I see so many names I don't recognize.<P>Probably most of you don't know me but here's my update..<P>I've been doing pretty good, although I'm too busy..<BR>I want to file D but we both can't afford $ for a lawyer, and I asked my neighbor but she's not doing anything so I guess I have to do it myself.<P>I talked to my H yesterday. It was fun.. the last time we talked is in January, and since then he moved out of town, and seems he's still struggling. We chatted about what we were doing in general, some silly stuff. He said he still think about what happened to us.<P>I felt sorry for him, even though I still have pains but I know I will be ok. seems like he's stuck at the same place where he was an year ago.<BR>I didn't tell him but I've forgiven him(and OW). By doing so I feel good about myself. I don't know if I will be ok to see them together, but with time I will be ok for sure. it's time for me to let it go.<P>I still care for him in some ways.. and I really hope that he will be ok, he suffered enough with his own mess.<P>When we talked we didn't talk about OW at all, and the conversation was very good, but at the end I think H was crying.<P>Not a lot of update. But I have inner peace, and that's important. Last year around this time I never ever thought I would be at this point. I was thinking of killing myself. Life is starting to be beautiful again, and maybe when time is right I may meet someone..<P>Thanks for reading and hope everybody's pain will go away with time.<P>Hugs,<P>Meg
