After 25 years of marriage I am painfully stricken by this emotional trauma. My husband was leaving on a business trip and I found viagara and a condom in the lining of his briefcase. I found "v" once before in his suitcase and we worked through it. I also found a p.o.box key in his briefcase and he told me he has been receiving porno videos. I was not snooping, but we were working on his computer and these items became exposed. I don't know if I can work through this. He is a wonderful person, but this I cannot tolerate. He has appologized over and over. Help!

Welcome <B>janae</B>...<P>There is a post of general welcome I wish to share with you... <P>It has a lot of quick links to many of the <B>most</B> important MB sites...<BR>Click here ==> <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000553.html" TARGET=_blank>General Welcome for All New Builders(Newbies)</A><P><B>About your post</B>...<P>Sexual addiction is a very common problem...<BR>...exaserbated by the undue amount of immorality in the media.<P>Check out the following sites...<BR><B>Dangers of Online Relationships</B><BR><A HREF="http://www.wildxangel.com/" TARGET=_blank>What They're Not Telling You - Or How to Read Between the Lies!!</A><BR><A HREF="http://www.chatcheaters.com" TARGET=_blank>Internet Infidelity Prevention, Detection, Advice and Books</A><BR><A HREF="http://netaddiction.com/" TARGET=_blank>Center for On-Line Addiction</A><BR><A HREF="http://temagami.uwaterloo.ca/~petz/affair.html" TARGET=_blank>Affairs of the Internet</A><BR><B>Sexual Addiction</B><BR><A HREF="http://www.sa.org/b000english/b020problem.html" TARGET=_blank>Sexaholics Anonymous</A><BR><A HREF="http://www.sexhelp.com/" TARGET=_blank>Welcome to SexHelp.com...Dr. Carnes' Resources for Sex Addiction & Recovery</A><BR><A HREF="http://www.sexaddict.com/" TARGET=_blank>SEX ADDICTION RECOVERY RESOURCES</A><BR>...and books...<BR><B>Sexual Addition - Serial Cheating:</B><BR><OL TYPE=1><BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1568380550" TARGET=_blank><B>Out of the Shadows :</B> Understanding Sexual Addiction</A> by Patrick J. Carnes<BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0553351389" TARGET=_blank><B>Don't Call It Love :</B> Recovery from Sexual Addiction</A> by by Patrick J. Carnes Ph.D.<BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0345378563" TARGET=_blank><B>Love and Betrayal</B></A> by John Amodeo, Charles L. Whitfield<BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1576830284" TARGET=_blank><B>False Intimacy :</B> Understanding the Struggle of Sexual Addiction</A> by Harry W. Schaumburg, Harry W. Shaumburg<BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0800757106" TARGET=_blank><B>Living With Your Husband's Secret Wars</B></A> by Marsha Means<BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0800757173" TARGET=_blank><B>Men¹s Secret Wars</B></A> by Patrick A. Means<BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0062554808" TARGET=_blank><B>Back from Betrayal :</B> Recovering from His Affairs</A> by Jennifer Schneider<BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0891097031" TARGET=_blank><B>Bold Love</B></A> by Dr. Dan B. Allender, Dr. Tremper Longman III, Dan B. Allender, Tremper Longman<BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0062553437" TARGET=_blank><B>Sex Lies and Forgiveness :</B> Couples Speaking Out on Healing from Sex Addiction</A> by Jennifer P. Schneider, Burt Schneider<BR><LI> <A HREF="http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0891092897" TARGET=_blank><B>The Wounded Heart:</B> Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse</A> by Dan B. Allender, Larry Crabb<BR></OL><P>Do start on a <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A</A>...<BR>Check out my post <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum30/HTML/000176.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A - 101 (2nd ed.)</A>.<P>...and...<P>Have your H start some serious counseling.<P> <P><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000254.html" TARGET=_blank>Jim</A> / <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000037.html" TARGET=_blank>NSR</A>