I am thinking that I am unable to compete with OW#2 because not only is it her. It is also her Family. Her kids and HER parents. My H is living with Her parents. They have all sorts of good toys over there to play with. I am sure he doesn't have any "responsibilities". They have just opened their arms up to my H and My kids and invited them to be "their" family. He says they know about OW #1 but I have a hard time believing that.<P>Why, someone tell me WHY, a man would want to start another relationship with another woman with all those kids. She has 3 kids. Good friends? <P>The interesting thing, he has turned his back on most of his family, most of them disapprove of what he is doing but "can't do anything" about it. His brother still hangs with him but he is divorced and remarried so "there is life on the other side" although he knows the impact of divorce on kids. <P>Another thing, my H is seeing a counselor now. I don't know what they talk about but it appears that either H is lying, I never knew him, but they don't seem to be discussing his "situation" and how terrible it really is? Esp. in regards to the kids. <P>I don't know anymore. One day at a dtime<P>Hopelessmom<BR>

hopelessmom,<BR>I'm sorry your situation is not getting better.<P>Sometimes families and friends feel helpless when they see someone doing wrong.<P>Sometimes a bad or ineffective counselor is worse than none at all.<P>{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hopelessmom}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>------------------<BR>Lor<BR>"Whatever is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, gracious...think about these things." Phil 4:8

Goodmorning Hopeless:<P>I just hate to see you so down on yourself when I know this is probably just the situation....you are seeing things through a gloom just as much as your WS is seeing things through his fog. My main concern is you...and your kids...forget about him for a while. You can say and do anything and it won't have much effect right now.<P>As for his being "responsibility free"...that attempt is common in MLC...to sit back and let someone else take care of you...but the OP will not usually continue to give this kind of support to him for an extended period...even they get tired of no commitment. So his time is coming.<P>As we've said in the past now is the time for you to be concentrating on you and working on your issues...it really does give you a focus that helps to take your mind off of him. I know it's hard....but you really are serving no purpose by beating yourself up. <P>It really just hurts me to see you like this because I've been there and I know it will get better. Please keep posting and letting us talk to you...that's what you need right now...not the "fog" influenced words and actions of your WS. <P>Faye<BR>

If your husband has lived a life with responsiblities and now he has none eventually that will get old. It's like a vacation. You go to Florida and you keep yourself just relaxing, riding rides and having a great time. Eventually you miss you life at home and the responsibilities. How old is your husband that he'd be content living with her parents? I agree with the other posts, forget about him for awhile and concentrate on your kido's.