Now I know why I haven't heard from WS, he was talking to lawyer. I received an Email from him indicating that he had talked to a lawyer and wanted to serve me with papers for divorce and ask where I wanted them served. The Email went on to as usual blame me that I wanted him to get on with things and let me move on like I deserve to do. He said he would be easy on me considering the situation but he must have a live however meager it may be. (which means that he intends to fight me for my little bit of inheritance that my family left me, i have no living family)<P>He said he was sorry about everything and hoped that it could have worked out but it was not possible. He said I do not blame you for not forgiving me, as I do not forgive myself. I was not happy in our relationship to begin with which is not an excuse for what happened. He said he cared and loved me and the boys and he wished it would be a civil as possible for the boys. He said he was sorry for not being the man I expected him to be and that I was a good woman and would be rewarded.<P>Help, now what am I supposed to do. Just as in the past 15 mths, he has left out important facts, He committed adultry, he left his family, he lied, cheated and stole our family from us, but this makes him look like the good guy. <P>What do I do? SEF

SEF...<P>Don't wait for the papers to be served...<BR>...you must protect yourself and the children...<P>Get legal advice...<BR>... I usually make the recommendation of finding a <B>good</B> attorney. A good place to start off is at the <A HREF="http://lawyers.martindale.com/marhub/form/by.html" TARGET=_blank>Martindale-Hubbell Lawyer Search</A> site. Do a search within your county... look for only "family law" specialists(>80% in divorce/custody/etc.)... make sure they do a lot of "family law committee work"... if they know the judges all the better... You can normally find a few that will give initial counseling free of charge.<BR><A HREF="http://www.uslaw.com" TARGET=_blank>USLaw.com</A> (an alternative search site)<P>I don't know your whole story...<BR>...but if you're in Plan A... stick with it!<BR>...it be harder now to do that... but it will reap it's rewards.<P>Legally, you'll have to start documenting <B>everything</B>...<BR>...that was for me too... the hardest thing to do...<P>I'm praying for you... <BR>Anytime a spouse files a divorce against another...<BR>...it is <B>very</B> difficult... especially emotionally...<P> <P><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000254.html" TARGET=_blank>Jim</A> / <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000037.html" TARGET=_blank>NSR</A>

I agree with <B>NSR</B>... hurry and find a lawyer NOW!!<P>...and I'll add that if you don't want a divorce don't sign the papers...<P>I am very sorry for your continued pain.

I already have a lawyer, but I haven't filed as my church doesn't believe in sueing another Christian. He knew that I talked to one but I have not paid for any legal advise, but the attorney agreed to take my case if necessary. We have been in Plan B for 3 months, he moved out, supposedly A is over, OW moved 2 hours away. As a Christian, I am to fight the divorce, but do I sign anyway?

Sign nothing without a lawyer looking over <B>any AND all</B> documents...<P>Plan B leads you down the road to making the divorce...<BR>...acceptable as a consequence of his actions...<P>Go into this knowing...<BR>...if your H is head strong about this...<BR>...you will not be able to stop the divorce!<P>Prayer and building a relationship with God...<BR>...will help you through all of this!<P>My prayers are with yours.<P> <P>Jim

I don't have any legal advice for you <P>But how long were you in plan A before going to plan B? Any chance to go back to A? <P>I'm a Christian too, so I know what you mean - we aren't suppose to sue fellow Christians. Aren't inheritances sole property in your state? Unless he was named in the inheritance, I believe it is your property. Maybe you could do an internet search on the laws in your state to find out about community/marital property and inheritances... just an idea.<P>Hang in there.<BR>TnT