After reading the post contact by BS to OP, a question came to my mind. <P><BR>How many BS have had the OP call them after the affair was truely ended?<P><BR>My H's OW called me the 1st time that he left her for me and told me how sorry she was bah bah bah. Looking back on it, I now realize that was a ploy to make him feel bad.<P><BR>She hasnt called me since that time and he has left her 2xs since then with the last one with a no contact letter and the best of my knowledge hasnt had contact within the last 2 months.<P><BR>Would you think she would still call me now to tell me of the tales of the A?<p>[This message has been edited by ZZZ4991 (edited May 08, 2001).]

<BR>How many BS have had the OP call them after the affair was truely ended?>>>><P>That was when she first called me. He had been living with her (unknown to me, kept lying). He was back and forth afew times. She never called me any of those times. When I spoke to her she mentioned the "times he had left her" but it msut have been along the lines of "I'm not sure what I want blah blah". Same crap I was hearing. At that point in time she didnt' want to burn any bridges by telling me. After he ended it for real and was ready to come home for real (his personality change was pretty drastic) she couldn't get on that phone fast enough. Worst case scenario - He got mad at her. Big deal. She was already dumped. Best case scenario - I would kick him out and he would go back to her by default. She had nothing to lose. First I go the phony apology and then the famous "I thought you deserved to know." Naturally I hadn't deserved to know DURING the affair lol. As soon as I said we wouldn't be splitting up the fangs, claws and venom were released and she really went to town.<P><BR>

My story is fairly similar to that of fairydust. I had contacted the OW via email to confirm the fact that she was involved with my H. She denied, denied, denied ... until the EMR ended, and then I got a big package of their email and long letters from her kvetching about my H and what it was like to live with him (as though I didn't know all of this already - it was sort of like telling Noah about the flood). H was enraged. Of course, I brought it on myself, was his excuse. He was also miffed that she "betrayed" his secrets and proved to be "disloyal." For months afterward, H had "anon" phone calls on his cell, and I got tons of hang-up calls on the home phone very late at night. XOW left a nasty message for H around Christmas time telling him what a jerk he was. <P>The irony of the situation is that had she just fessed up to the EMR when I first asked, I would have divorced H with dispatch and she could have had my H free and clear. H doesn't believe that things like that happened, the XOW contacting the W. I only wish that he knew how frequently it DOES happen.<P>belld