My wife has been in a two year EA/PA with OM who is now divorced. Two weeks ago we had a conversation and she said that she is unhappy wants a divorce etc. We talked about money the kids (6 and 4). Most the the conversation was somewhat civil and we came to some sort of agreement.<P>I told her in no uncertain terms is this something that I wanted and continue to think that things can be worked out. In fact I said that a legal seperation would probably be better. I have provided her with full disclosure of our money. Our anniversery was this week and she gave me a card talking about decisions that we have made together that will change our livee. Says that I have been very good to her and that she will always think of me in a favorable light.<P>My question to the group is that I am getting really fed up with the whole deal. I have been in some form of plan A for two years now. She conintues to talk to OM etc and babysits his kids while he looks for a job sometimes. She always ask me if it is OK if you can imigine that.<P>Anyway I want to bring this thing to a head one way or another. She no longer wears her wedding rings, we have not dated in two years, no counseling, and no sex. I would like to ask her where she is after our covnersation a couple of weeks ago. I pretty much asked her in a letter that I wrote to her this week for our aniversery. Does anyone have any suggestions as to how to approach this topic?

Zip,<P>I would suggest that you give one of the Harley's a call. At the very least it sounds as if Plan B is called for. But, if you feel it is over, then it is over. You are the only one fighting this and when you decide you don't want to any longer, then it will be over, I fear.<P>I wish I could offer you some great advice, and hopefully some of the others here can.<P>God Bless,<P>JL

". She no longer wears her wedding rings, we have not dated in two years, no counseling, and no sex."<P>Her actions show that she has already divorced you in her mind. What you have right now is a business arrangement. You might as well make it official. Open the cage door and let her out.