We are teetering on the edge of divorce. My H is using the 'excuse' of not wanting to end his A, because he doesn't "desire" me. And, of course, sex is a biggie with him. He tells me he loves me and, even though his behavior has<BR>been extremely disrespectful & hurtful, I do believe him. But, I also can't help but wonder if he's pulling my leg. <P>I feel that the main reason he has this problem around me is because he has had some serious problems with landing a job that pays well. I have been the primary breadwinner for several years now. Even, the first therapist I saw picked up on this and the first words out of his mouth were, "your husband probably feels emasculated". I have never, never put my husband down about this, although I did 'encourage' him to go out and look for a job when he had finally given up. The more I pushed, with subsequent rejection, the worse he felt.<P>My H is very frustrated about this & we've talked about it endlessly. He cannot understand it himself because he says he finds me attractive and we were pretty good together at one time. I am far from aggressive, but I have had to pick up the slack at home when my H slowly sunk into depression. It seems the more capable I've become, the worse his self esteem got.<P>I guess this is a classic example of a Harley need. My H needs to feel like he's the provider or at least pulling his weight. I knew this and that's why I pushed him to get back into the workforce. I feel like I'm at my whits end here.<P>Has anyone else out there run up against this and how did you deal with it? I know this is a "male" thing, but guys, can you explain this to me?? I know the male ego is fragile, but now I'm wondering if my H even HAS an ego???