After dinner last night, H started talking about moving to another city or state last night. He made it sound as if we'd be moving together. I was surprised because he has said to me that he expects counseling to result in my finally understanding that he must leave the marriage. But the past few days, he's been talking of the future in terms of what we both want to do.<P>He hasn't said he's ending things with OW, but he has left his phone with me for the past two days (supposedly accidentally). I can access the voice mail from any phone, and there have been no new messages from her in two days.<P>I know he has a couple of new email accounts that I haven't been able to access, so he could be contacting her that way. (I won't say I hacked into his other accounts, but he did leave his access codes in convenient places for me.) He hasn't been using home computer. (Probably using one at work.)<P>I'm not sure whether I should be hopeful, or he's just being clever. (Until the A, he had never been deceitful.)<BR>What do you all think?<P><BR><P>------------------<BR>See each day as a new beginning!<P>Cali

Is there enough electricity to be in shock out there? <P>From your description, he's either trying to pull the wool over your eyes that it's over, or it's over. Of course, we hope it's the latter.<P>I don't know how many laps you've taken on the infidelity roller coaster, but the ups and downs can come at anytime. After a while, BSs seem to realize that we can't place too much worth on day-to-day ups and downs. We need to step back and look long term - like following the stock market.<P>My point is, that we're doomed to frustration if we react to every current in the river. If your H is being honest, you have reason to be hopeful. But you can never tell until the behavior is demonstrated over a longer period - even then, the ups and downs may still be there.<P>So, what do I think? I think you should file this conversation and recent events away and stay on your toes for other clues. Don't make conclusions on individual conversations or events. Always think long term.<P>I hope this helps,<BR>WAT

Yeah, that is what my head is telling me. My heart is another matter.<P>I read so many of the posts and you all talk about months and years of recovery...I just can't imagine how I will survive it that long.<P>I think a part of me just wants it to be like that episode of Dallas when Pamela Ewing dreamed the whole season. Just wake me up from this nightmare and let me have my life back. <P>On the other hand, I know it can't be exactly the same as that's what got us here in the first place. <P><BR>As for electricity, we could light up the whole state with the shock I've been in .<BR><P>------------------<BR>See each day as a new beginning!<P>Cali