HI, Gang,<BR>I've been posting on the boards here since March of this year. Somehow, I need to start and end my day by checking in and reading as many posts as I can. It has been such a help to me during this difficult time. Thank God for this place!!<P>Now, I would like to start another poll:<BR>How many BS's out there are chronically ill? By that I mean an illness or condition that needs continuing medical care. Do you think--or know--that your illness played a part in your WS's having an A? If you suspect that this is the case, did you ever come out and ask your WS about it, and if so, do you feel he or she was honest with you?<P>I am struggling with this one because I am chronically ill and will continue to need major surgeries for the rest of my life. After 8 months of sheer torture and misery (since D day), my WS finally blurted out just the other day, "You didn't REALLY expect me to put up with your illness for the restof MY life, too, did you?" !! This, followed by: "I DESERVE a life of my own!" (Well, he's got it, if he wants it. I saw a lawyer the next day and only wish I had done that far sooner.)<P>He might as well as drove a knife through my heart. As much as it hurt, this told me all that I needed to know. He just doesn't want to deal with me or my health issues any longer. All of the other crap he espoused all these months is just that: crap. The smoke-screening, the inane comments and 'reasons'....all of it. It was just a cover for his true feelings.<P>Sadly, illness is one thing that cannot always be changed for the better, as in my case. But, as I told him, "If this had been YOU, I would have stuck by your side and in fact, become even more devoted because of your needs." <P>So much for "better or worse", eh? The question is, 'how much worse?' I guess what I'm trying to find out is how other people would react or behave if chronic illness suddenly came to call. It takes real courage to be honest with this question! <P>Hugs to all,<BR>Winny<BR>