I have been in a relationship with someone that is divorced with an XW from He*l. The person that I am seeing is a BS and I am also the BS from my previous marriage. The problem that my partner and I are facing is the boundaries that we need to set with our ex's. Both ex's have "seen the light" and want to repent and come back to us. However, too much emotional damage was done to both of us and that just is not an option. Those of you that are in relationships, what kind of boundaries do you have established with your ex's. We both have 1 child from our previous marriage so cutting all ties is not an option. Also, we all live in a small town. Moving is not an option because my partner is not the primary custodian of the child. Please off any advice that you have. Thanks!!!

My husband and I also ea. have kids and ex's. Maybe I will be able to offer some suggestions. What type of boundaries are you talking about? Examples would help.

Boundaries:<P>1. What type of phone conservations are acceptable?<BR>2. Are phone conservations between the ex's discussed between you and your partner? Before or After?<BR>3. How much communication is there between you and your ex? What type of communication do you have?<BR>4. Does your ex ask you do do favors? If so, do you do them?<P>Hope this helps.<BR>

Personally, I would keep contact only where/when it concerns the children.<P>Let them know you are in a relationship & do not seek reconciliation. Don’t be mean about it, just matter of fact.<P>If they call and want to just chat, let them know you don’t want to.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A>

Boundaries:<P>1. What type of phone conservations are acceptable? Conversations involving the kids only. No small talk or personal things.<P>2. Are phone conservations between the ex's discussed<BR> between you and your partner? Before or After? That totally depends on what the discussion was about. If it involves me (i.e. change in visitation day or time) then yes but if it's something small then we usually don't discuss it.<BR>3. How much communication is there between you and your<BR> ex? What type of communication do you have? For me my communication is almost non-existant. He can't and won't carry on an adult conversation. My husband and his ex co-parent very well. The only communicate when something needs to be said that directly relates to the kids. Taking a guess, I would say the "talk" about once a week at best.<P>4. Does your ex ask you do do favors? If so, do you do them?<P>Favors? No. and if asked, depends on what type of favor.<P> <BR>