I have found circumstantial evidence that my wife is having an affair and I am not sure what to do about it.<P>We have been separated for 7 months and things are not going <BR>well. I have tried everything I can to make it work and it has seemed to push her farther away.<BR>I am now on the, "I love you, I want this to work out, but I am not waiting on you anymore" page.<P>Anyway, since I have allowed her to move back into the house and I have moved out I have noticed a few things and I had prior knowledge of other things before she left.<BR>When I was trying to clean up the house to please her after she left, I discovered a vibrator. I didn't think anything of it at the time, but a few weeks later the box she had hidden it in came crashing down on me in the closet when I was in there and I noticed the vibrator was gone.<BR>I never confronted her about it.<BR>Since she has moved back in she continues to hide things in this box. I have found what appears to be a man's watch, anal beads, and a set of handcuffs.<BR>This seems to be pretty strong evidence for me to feel she is doing something she doesn't want me to know about. <BR>The question is what do I do about it? I want to confront her about it, but I am not sure in how that I should go about doing it or if it even matters anymore at this point.<BR>I don't want her to feel that I violated her privacy, but I want her to understand at the same time I will not tolerate this.<BR>I wonder who she is doing this with. At first I suspected OM but I have never found any evidence until now. I have been suspecting for awhile that she might be doing something with the girlfried that she moved into our house after I moved out and she moved back in. I have never had any indication that she might be bi.<P>Anyway, any ideas or suggestions would be helpful. Also, read my post in "Why Women Leave Men" for more info.<BR>Thanks Chase.<BR>

I am sorry I cannot help you right now, but I wanted you to know I read your post and will try to respond later. I will also try to read your post in the "Why Women Leave Men" board.

Have you considered phone counseling for yourself from Steve or Jennifer Harley? I think they would provide you with the necessary tools to get through this and possibly save your marriage.<P>I would tell her [b]hosestly[/] about what you found, without LoveBusting at all. So, if you found this box while snooping, you would need to tell her. And apologize. Have you read the book SAA and the articles on this site? Are you in plan A? I think that is your best plan to save your marriage.